The Springfield Chronicles: iLove Magic
by Grominator
Summary: The first story of the Springfield Chronicles series. Negi's return flight from Wales to Japan after Summer break is redirected to Seattle and he ends up at Ridgeway teaching English to the class of a certain trio.
1. Spell 1: The New Teacher

As a thank you to all my loyal readers, I'd like to celebrate the first night of Chanukah with the release of my third fic. This is the first in the series I've dubbed, "The Springfield Chronicles": a series of "What-If" type X-Over stories that take place independent of the Negima series (some of them anyway).

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Negima! or iCarly. **Updated: 2/1/2013**

* * *

iLove Magic

It was a beautiful morning at Ridgeway Junior High School in Seattle, but that's not why the entire place was in an uproar. The dreaded English teacher, Francine Briggs was finally being replaced with someone fresh and new. Carly Shay couldn't help but walk with a skip in her step as she came in to find streamers all over the hallway to welcome the new teacher (and celebrate Ms. Briggs' dismissal).

As she arrived at her locker, she found her friends Sam and Freddie … getting along?! The two had been like bitter enemies and hated each other ever since they'd met, but for the first time in her life, Carly was actually seeing them laughing _with_ each other instead fighting each other, and by fighting each other, it usually meant Sam was dominating Freddie in every sense of the word, especially physically.

"Hey, Carly," said Freddie cheerfully.

"Yo, Carls," Sam said with equal cheer in her voice.

"Wait," Carly started skeptically. "You two are actually … acting like friends?"

"We're not just acting," Freddie told her.

"Yup," Sam agreed, putting her arm around Carly. "The day we see Ms. Briggs get fired is the day me and Freddie are nice to each other –"

"– because nothing is better than getting rid of a teacher who hates us and subjects us to the most hated musical instrument on the face of the planet," finished Freddie.

"What? You mean the bagpipes? I thought the accordion was the most hated instrument of all time."

"Nope," Sam corrected. "Nothing is worse than Ms. Briggs' bagpipes."

"Really? Well, if you had to spend two hours a year with the Dorfmans, you would agree with me," Carly told them with a shudder and a wretch. "Ugh."

"Anyway, Carly, Sam, we'd better get to class before the new teacher arrives," Freddie said, looking at his watch as the bell rang. "We don't want to get detention."

"Aw, c'mon, Benson," Sam interrupted him. "New teachers don't give detentions on their first day."

"That's what you said on Ms. Ackerman's first day," Carly reminded her matter-of-factly.

"She gave me an F minus on a test I left blank. What was I supposed to do? Study? Just because all my answers were blank doesn't mean they were wrong, does it?"

"Uh, generally, yes," Carly answered her slowly.

"And you slashed her tires," Freddie reminded her.

"That was totally unrelated," Sam snapped.

"Yeah, it so wasn't," Freddie said under his breath.

"What was that, Fredward?"

"Nothing," he said quickly.

At that moment, Principal Franklin came around the corner and found them still in the hall. "Come on, kids, you don't want to be out in the hall when your new teacher comes in."

"Why not?" Sam asked him.

"Trust me, you'll want to be sitting down when you meet him," their Principal told them, and he herded them into the classroom.

When they were all in the classroom he turned to the class. "Okay, students," he began. "Please be seated, and Gibby, please put your shirt back on."

"Yes, sir," their pudgy, shirtless friend said as he sat down and pulled his shirt back over his head. For whatever reason, taking his shirt off for no reason seemed to be Gibby's hobby, plus he often did it to celebrate certain things, and to Gibby, today was a great day to be shirtless. Ms. Briggs had always picked on Gibby just for the fun of it, so it was a big weight off his shoulders to have her gone from his life forever.

"Now, your new teacher will be with you shortly. He is just finishing a bit of paperwork in my office. His name is Professor Negi Springfield. He is a genius the likes of which I've never seen before. He achieved a Bachelor's degree at Oxford University at the age of 9. I hope that you will treat him with respect, especially you, Sam," he said, gesturing towards the class troublemaker, who smiled innocently. "Now get your books out, he'll be with you in a few minutes." He left the room, leaving the students to contemplate their new situation.

"Oh, great," Sam groaned, her joy about losing Briggs now gone. "A genius. This means he'll be looking down on us even more than our other teachers, and that was bad enough already. Now class is gonna be more boring than ever."

The minutes passed, and still nobody came through the door. Everyone was starting to get impatient, until Sam stood up. "That's it, he's late."

"What are you doing?" Carly asked the abrasive blonde.

"Giving the teacher his first lesson: always be on time," she said with her mischievous smile as she grabbed an eraser from the chalkboard and rubbed the last piece of chalk on it until the chalk was all rubbed out. She stood on a chair, cracked the door open and delicately placed the eraser between the door and the frame, but at the very top so nobody on the outside would notice.

"That's what he gets for coming in late – a head full of dust," she said in a satisfied, yet bored tone as she took her seat behind Freddie.

"Will you ever give anyone a chance _before_ making their lives miserable?" Freddie turned around to ask her, sounding amused.

"Not once, baby."

Finally, they heard a voice on the other side of the door. "Oh, the door's already open. Well, I'll just let myself in."

_Showtime!_ Sam thought with great anticipation.

* * *

Well, there you have it. As Sam and Carly refer to her as, the horrible bubble-butt with crazy pointy boobs, Miss Francine Briggs is gone and there's a new teacher coming. It's only his first day and Sam is already going against him. She'll never change, will she? What will happen to our new, unknown Professor ... who isn't so unknown ... at least to us.

**Please review and check back later in about two weeks for the next update.**


	2. Spell 2: A Magician For a Teacher

Ask for an update, and you shall receive as soon as I am able. I think you'll be satisfied with this one, because I know I was.

**Edited and enhanced: 2/1/2013.**

* * *

A Magician for a Teacher?!

The door seemed to swing open in slow-motion, and just before the eraser fell, Carly was sure she saw a young boy, no more than 10 years old, walk into the room. Then the eraser seemed to strike his head dead-on with a low POOF. A thick loud of dust was kicked up by the impact, engulfing the boy entirely.

"Woo-hoo! Yeah, baby. Right on target!" Sam stood up and yelled, feeling triumphant over her apparently successful prank, unable to control herself. But then the cloud of dust began to dissipate, and the clearer things got, the wider her eyes got. There was no longer anyone there. The boy had mysteriously disappeared. Then Sam felt something settling in her hair. As she looked around, another little cloud of white dust floated down around her. "What? What happened to my hair? WHY IS THERE CHALK DUST IN _MY_ HAIR?!"

The entire class was awestruck. Not only had Sam's prank failed, but she seemed to experience exactly what was supposed to happen to whomever walked through the door.

"What just happened?" Carly and Gibby both turned to Freddie at the same time, only to find he'd asked the same question at the same time.

As if to answer their question for them, the closet door suddenly opened, and out stepped a young man in his late-teens. "Good morning, everyone," he greeted them warmly with a smile as he crossed to the front of the room and set his briefcase on the desk. He was wearing a green suit with a red-brown tie, and had auburn hair that reminded Sam of a big meatball, as almost everything made her think of meat. There was a scar on his left cheek, but it only seemed to compliment his features. He was so handsome, and he spoke with such a charming British accent that the jaws of every girl in the room dropped. "I hope you enjoyed my little switcharoo just now."

After what seemed like several minutes of silence, Carly raised her hand and spoke. "Uh, what happened to the boy that came through the door? And how long were you in the closet?"

"Yeah, and how did all this chalk dust get in my hair?" Sam added, still trying to shake it loose.

"Oh, right," the young man said casually. "Let me help you with that." He walked over to Sam and started moving his hands around her head, as if attempting to perform some kind of pantomime routine, and then suddenly snapped his fingers and closed his hands. At the same moment, Sam started scratching her ear.

"All of a sudden, it feels like I've gone deaf in this ear," she said, trying to stick her finger in her ear to unclog it.

"Come on, Sam," Freddie said, not buying it. "We all know you're not deaf."

"No, I mean it!" she said, scratching harder, as though ready to rip her ear off. "There's something in there. I can't hear anything in that ear." But before she could say anything else, the young man put two fingers near Sam's ear and said, "Watch carefully, students. Nothing up my sleeve, and …" and with a funny sounding whistle, he pulled an extra-long piece of chalk from the speechless blonde's ear.

He was instantly met with thunderous applause from the class. The shocked Carly, Freddie and Gibby were among the loudest.

"Wait a minute," Sam interrupted. "How did _that_ get in my ear?"

"Oh, this?" the man grinned innocently. "Ever since I entered this room, you've had it. You simply didn't realize it."

"Huh?!" Sam couldn't help but say.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all today," the man said, walking back to his new desk, tossing his piece of chalk up and down in his hand. Turning around, he put on another big smile and said, "I'm your new English teacher, Negi Springfield."

After several seconds, Sam voiced the question on everyone's minds. "What did he say? Did you hear what he said?"

"I heard what he said – I think he said he's our teacher. Did you hear that, too?" Carly said, looking at Freddie.

"I heard that too. Could he really be our teacher?" he looked at Gibby.

"It sounded like he said he was our teacher," their slightly-overweight classmate repeated.

By this time, half the class, including Negi, was in stitches. When he'd finally regained control of his laughter, the young man straightened up and said, "Yes, you didn't hear me wrong. I _am_ your new teacher, Professor Negi Springfield. And to answer your earlier question Miss Shay, that child who walked in when the eraser fell was me."

"What?" Freddie exclaimed.

"What?!" Sam sputtered.

"What?" half the class seemed to say.

"WHAT?!" Carly practically screamed.

Professor Springfield chuckled lightly. "Principal Franklin gave a similar reaction when he interviewed me and I told him that. In reality, this form you see before you is nothing more than an illusion, produced by specially treated mirrors and a special projector hidden somewhere in this room. It is designed to be virtually invisible and will only respond to a certain verbal command."

As people started looking around the room, he chuckled again. "Try as you might, you won't find it, students. Oh, and one last thing. Sam Puckett?"

"Uh, yes?" she answered, her eyes darting from side to side.

"I think you've gotten a taste of my attitude for pranksters in my classroom."

"What? But you can't prove that I did it?" she snapped, a little preemptively.

"Oh, but I _can_! And not just because of that preemptive statement," he grinned mischievously. He reached into his pocket and took out a miniature tape-recorder. With the push of a button, Sam's voice shouted, "Woo-hoo! Yeah, baby. Right on target!"

"Need I say more?" Negi winked at Sam, who shrank back into her seat and laughed sheepishly.

Half of the class applauded. Sam had been a thorn in the sides of many teachers for as long as they'd known her, and probably even before, so they were really impressed to see someone get the better of her for once.

"And by the way," he told them. "Just an eraser on the head is practically the oldest rick in the book of classroom pranks. I would know, because two of the students in my first class as good as wrote the book. On my first day, it was an eraser, then a tripwire that triggered an empty-bucket-on-the-head, followed by three suction-cup arrows on the butt, finally ending with a big hit to the back when I hit the desk." At this, even he had to laugh, followed by a few others who were bold enough to follow his lead. "It was very original."

"Uh, Mr. Spri –" Freddie started to raise his hand to speak.

"No, no, no, Mr. Benson. There's no need to call me that," Negi waved his question aside. "You can call me 'Professor,' or just Negi. After all, I'm younger than you guys, actually."

Many students were surprised. "Observe," he said, spreading out his arms. "My true self. _Dispulsatio!_"

There was a poof of white smoke and a flash of light, and in moments, a young boy stood before them. "Nice to properly meet you all. I am Negi Springfield, your new homeroom and English teacher.

Negi walked to an empty desk and sat down. "What were you about to ask, Mr. Benson?"

"Oh – well, I was wondering, what will we be doing today?"

"Eager, aren't you? Well, I thought we could spend the rest of the class period learning more about each other. We'll each take a couple of minutes and talk about ourselves. Names, hobbies, interests, goals in life … you know, that sort of thing. Shall I start?" His question was met with a generous answer.

"Well, you know me as Negi Springfield, but please, just call me 'Negi,' or 'Professor' would be acceptable as well. Principal Franklin probably told you about my college degree despite my young age, but there is something you probably figured out about me: in addition to being a teacher, I'm also a magician."

There was a great big "WHOA!"

"That's right," he smiled. "When I was growing up, my grandfather, the Dean of an Academy of Magic in Wales, England taught me almost everything he knew about magic. I can do almost anything, as you've already seen. I can transfer myself from one place to another really fast, as I did earlier, I can even put back together dust particles and make them appear in a person's ear, my own personal touch on the old 'Quarter in the ear' illusion, with the addition of induced deafness."

"So that's what you did to me?" Sam interrupted.

"Yes, and I don't like giving out detentions on my first day, Samantha Puckett. Franklin told me all about you, but I'll go easy this time."

"Thank you," she smiled at him. "You won't regret this."

"I certainly hope not," he commented with a grin.

"Excuse me, sir?" Gibby raised his hand.

"Yes, go ahead."

"You said you had one class before us. So what happened? Did you get fired or something?"

"Why no, not at all. Actually, one week ago, my class and I were on our way back from a trip to Wales. But apparently, an emergency required I stay back and take a later flight to Japan, but obviously I took a wrong turn and got on the wrong plane. So there I was, in Seattle with no idea what to do now. Lo and behold, I find an ad in the paper for a replacement English teacher, so I figured that until I can contact Mahora Academy and book a flight back to Japan in about a month, I'd teach here."

"So what are your goals in life, Professor?" Carly asked with interest.

"To find my father. You see, my parents disappeared when I was just a baby. But when I was only a few years old, my village in Wales was attacked and burned down, and most of the villagers … were killed."

There was an audible gasp.

"And when I was about to be killed, my father suddenly appeared and saved me and my older sister, driving out all the attackers. But then he disappeared again. My goal is to travel the world, in the hopes of finding him again, even if it's just long enough to get to _know_ him."

His class was in awe. For the rest of the period, they mostly just asked him questions about his father and his life. He didn't get a lot of time to find out about them before the bell rang.

"Well, that's it for today, everyone. Your only homework for tonight is to write me a page about you. Tell me about yourselves so I may get to know my students."

* * *

"Well, that was nice of him not to give Sam detention," Carly said as they walked out of school that afternoon.

"Yeah, now she can help us plan iCarly for tomorrow night," Freddie added.

"Oh, come on," Sam complained lazily. "I've already got homework to do for the new teacher. He doesn't like to give detention, but he's never heard of 'no homework on your first day of teaching'?"

"There's no such thing," Freddie told her.

"Whatever, Benson."

"Come on," Carly said, trying to cheer her best friend up. "Let's go to the Groovy Smoothie. Then we'll go to my place and plan for the show."

"You know, speaking of iCarly, he never mentioned the show, even though he seemed to know about us from Principal Franklin. I wonder why?" Freddie asked.

"I don't know. Maybe he's just stupid," Sam suggested.

"I don't think so, Sam," Carly smiled. "Most geniuses tend to be smart."

"Just a thought," she said, dismissing her own comment. "There was the fact that he didn't really hold class today. He just kept talking about himself."

"Well, we were all asking him questions the whole time," Freddie pointed out.

"Shut up, Fredward. Let's take the bus. My mom said she'd sooner sleep with Spenser than give us another ride home this month."

"Just as long as no one falls asleep and we end up in Vancouver like Spenser did that one time. I'm looking at you, Sam," he said.

"And _I'm_ looking for something to hit you with," she shot back as they got on the school bus.

* * *

Well, it had to happen eventually. Sam is back to her old bully self, but it felt good to have someone stick it to her, especially since it was Negi who often been the punching bag of his class at Mahora. *coughs* Asuna! *coughs*

**Anything you'd like to see when they do iCarly? Because I'm fishing around for ideas. Let me know in a review!  
**

**Any reviews would be much appreciated.**


	3. Spell 3: A Local Hero

First, I want to thank you guys for those helpful suggestions. I just might put some of them into action somewhere down the line. I've been absent for a long time, and I have no excuses, so I'll try to make up for it with this long chapter, the longest I've written in a long time!

**Updated: 2/1/2013**

* * *

A Local Hero

As Carly, Sam and Freddie arrived at the corner of the Groovy Smoothie, they noticed a young girl standing on the corner. She had neck-length purple hair, which was a little unsettling to Carly and Freddie. As for Sam, she just thought she was some kind of delinquent. She looked confused and lost, as if she had no idea where to go.

"What's with that chick?" Sam whispered in Carly's ear.

"I don't know," she confessed in a whisper. "She sticks out like a sore thumb, as if she just doesn't belong."

"Come on, girls," Freddie tried to encourage them. "She looks like a nice girl. We should at least try to help her out, especially if she's lost." And with that, he walked confidently over to the girl.

"Hi!" he said kindly. "Can we help you? Is everything all right?"

The girl looked startled, drawing back at his approach. She immediately started speaking in a language Freddie didn't understand.

"Whoa, whoa. Easy," he tried to soothe her. "Okay, do you speak any English?" he asked, speaking his question a little slower this time.

She slowly nodded.

_Oh, good_, he thought as he let out a sigh of relief and stepped back to give her some space.

"Well, I was … told to wait here for someone at this time," she said timidly, this time in English.

"You're waiting for someone?" Carly asked, walking over. "Then why don't you come in with us until they get here?"

"Uh, well," she said slowly. "I don't know … I –"

"Oh, come on. It's not gonna kill ya," Sam decided for her as she took the girl by the arm and pulled her into the Groovy Smoothie with her, leaving Carly and Freddie trailing behind them.

"Sam!" Carly scolded her when her best friend finally stopped and gave the girl her arm back. "You're not supposed to do that."

"Like I've ever cared about that."

The poor girl looked so scared by Sam's attitude that she ran back outside and back to her waiting place.

"There, you see what you did?" Freddie snapped at Sam.

"Like I care," was her answer. "If the girl doesn't want to be with those who care about her, then far be it for me to try to help."

"By the look on her face, I'd guess you almost pulled her arm out of its socket. How is that caring?"

Carly just rolled her eyes. _Oh well, at least things are back to normal,_ she thought as she went up to order their drinks.

* * *

"Is she still out there, waiting?" Freddie asked curiously half an hour later.

"Yeah, she is," Carly craned her neck to see out the window.

"Man, I wonder who would lead her on like this," Freddie wondered out load.

"Some people can be so inconsiderate," Sam said evenly as she dropped her remaining fries into Freddie's smoothie.

"I wasn't done with my smoothie yet," he looked at her in disdain.

"Well, you are now," she answered as she calmly sipped her own. "Unless you like salty smoothies."

"Hey, what's going on over there?" Carly said suddenly, pointing out the window. A small number of kids were gathering by the window to look outside. If Sam hadn't been with them to shove everyone out of their way, they would have had a hard time seeing what was going on.

The Japanese girl had just taken out a large book when two people approached her. One was a rather skinny Caucasian boy and the other was a tall, burly-looking dark-skinned girl. Each had a pair of "friends" trailing behind them. Both groups were looking at her with a bad look in their eyes.

But what surprised everybody more than anything was that the girl was showing no signs of fear or intimidation.

"Oh no," Carly sighed. "It's those bullies, Jocelyn and Doug Toder."

"And they brought their goon squads, too," Freddie observed.

"Rrg. That girl is so annoying," Sam said between clenched teeth.

"Then why don't you go out there and whoop her again?" Freddie challenged her.

"No, not Jocelyn you idiot," Sam stuffed a handful of fries in Freddie's face.

"GAAAH!" he yelled in pain. "SALT IN MY EYES! IT BURNS!" He ran straight into the nearest bathroom, hoping it wasn't the Ladies' Room.

"I meant that weird girl," she went on. "She not backing down, like she's not afraid of them, even though they're about to kick her butt."

"What do you mean?" Carly looked at her best friend, who seemed transfixed on something.

"Just the look in her eyes. She's like a whole different person now."

* * *

"Who are you?" the girl asked at once, not taking her eyes off them. "And what do you want with me?" The timid girl of before now had a look of defiance upon her face that both Carly and Sam secretly had to admire.

"What did she say?!" Jocelyn shouted in frustration. "And what's with that defiant look? HUH?!" Her two tough girl followers cracked their knuckles.

"Hang on, Jocelyn," Toder stopped her. "Let me handle this one." He approached the girl with a smooth grin on his face, but the girl still did not back down.

"Sorry, about her," he said as he walked closer to her. "My friend tends to wear her emotions on her sleeve. Don't worry. We're not going to hurt anyone. My name is Doug –"

" – Toder," she finished for him.

Toder looked taken aback, and couldn't hide it. "You know about me?" he asked in surprise. "Well, I have been called a 'fencing prodigy' before, but I didn't think –"

"Actually," the girl cut him off again. "It is not as a 'fencing prodigy' that I'd heard of you as, but as a 'peerless fool.'"

People who had gathered around to watch were starting to laugh, but clammed up when Jocelyn threw angry looks their way.

As for Toder, he just stood there, silently mouthing the words "peerless fool" to himself. "Okay," he said in amusement, head in hand in spite of himself. "I don't know who thinks of me as a peerless fool, but –"

"Isn't it true that you, who never lost a fencing match, lost to a rookie in his first formal match, and then got beaten by his mother?" she said, drilling into him with words, words Toder never thought he would hear from some girl he'd never met.

"Hey, that never happened!" he yelled, his calm demeanor now forgotten. "I never lost! That match never ended –"

"– because you cheated and the match was stopped, right?!" she yelled back in defiance. The crowd, Toder included, went silent. "I can read you like a book, Doug Toder, and it is written all over your face. You have no honor in or out of the dojo, and by the look on your face, as well as your conduct today, you know it's true."

And this he did, because Toder was now walking toward the girl with his own emotions on his sleeve, which seemed to intimidate the girl, who almost fell over backward as he reached her. He pulled her up by her wrist, and holding it over her head, he put his face near hers. "You're going to apologize to me, and you're never going to tell anyone any of what you said today."

"Stop!" she cried, trying to get loose. "Let … go!"

"Yeah, you'd like that wouldn't you?" he laughed mockingly. "Jocelyn! Let's teach this girl how to respect those above her."

"Don't you tell me what to do, shrimp!" she shoved him off the girl and picked her up by her blouse. "This is gonna hurt you a lot worse than it's gonna hurt me, you little –!"

Jocelyn was pulling back her fist when she was nearly blown off her feet by a sudden powerful gust of wind and an almost ghostly voice rang through the crowded street.

"Let her go." Though the voice was soft, it made the large girl freeze in place.

* * *

"Go on, Sam!" Carly was practically shaking her friend. "Go help that girl before she gets pounded into mush!"

"What about getting pounded to mush?" asked Freddie, who'd just gotten out of the restroom, his eyes still red from the salty fries. "Whoa. Is that Doug Toder and that Amazon, Jocelyn?"

"Yes," Carly and Sam both said to his face from both sides.

"Well, why are you still here, Sam?" he said, rubbing his left eye with the back of his hand. "Why don't you go out there and mess them up like you always do?"

But Sam wasn't looking at the scuffle going on outside. Instead, she was looking to the right, out the edge of the window. "It looks like the hero has arrived just in time."

"Hero?" Carly and Freddie both blurted out before they felt a strong wind blow the door open, smacking the unsuspecting Gibby right in the face.

* * *

It had happened in only one instant. The moment Jocelyn had froze, she felt the wind rush around her as though it were solid as herself. The next second, her hand was empty – the Japanese girl hanging from her fist had totally vanished. But as the dust began to clear, she saw a silhouette. The person wasn't very tall, and was holding something in his/her arms.

Then she saw him: a young boy, no older than pre-teen, holding the girl in his arms like a prince whisking his princess out of danger. His eyes were locked on her; she didn't like that. "You want something, pipsqueak?! Huh?"

"You will not harm this girl," the boy said in a charming British accent as he set the Japanese girl down and whispered something in her ear. "If you have a tiff with her, you may take it up with me," he declared as he stood up.

"Hoo hoo," Toder laughed as Jocelyn cracked her knuckles in amusement. "We've got a brave one, haven't we? Listen kid. If you don't want to get hurt, I suggest you leave. You see, unlike my friend here, I don't like picking on little children."

The boy sighed heavily. "No, I don't suppose you would, but nonetheless I can see you're no gentleman, young man." He looked straight into Toder's eyes with the same fearless stare that the girl had shot him. "On the other hand, I would rather not fight if it can be avoided. Just leave and everything will be forgiven."

"You shouldn't copy what others say, little guy," he started walking toward the boy, who was wearing a t-shirt with plain jeans, not a usual fighter's choice of clothing, but not the worst outfit to fight in. However, what worried him more than anything was the stick the boy was carrying on his back. "After all, you don't wanna make people _angry_." He swung down his arm to knock the boy aside, but the boy somehow caught his arm with a single hand, and this hand was not soft and light like a normal little boy's hand – it was hard like steel with muscle to match.

"You know," the boy looked up at him. "If you don't know karate, you really shouldn't do karate."

"What?!"

"You were trying to knock me aside with a sideswipe," he continued. "An elementary move in many martial arts, and as such, it is easy to predict if you know what to watch for. Oh, and just so you know, you were wide open for a counter attack from nearly every direction. If you were fighting one of my masters right now, you'd probably have already found yourself nursing several shattered limbs, at the very least."

Toder drew back immediately. He didn't have his fencing saber with him, and he could tell he was at a disadvantage. Even though they were out in public, most people around them were too scared of Jocelyn to do or say anything. He had to smile about that. _It's good to have the scary ones on your side. But why couldn't I have been born that way? I'm always getting shortchanged. But this kid is different … he scares even me, but I don't think Jocelyn is smart enough to know how outmatched she is_. _Perhaps –"_

"WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR, FOOL?!" Jocelyn slapped him in the back of the head, almost knocking him for a loop. "If you're too weak to fight one little kid on your own, I guess I'll take him for you. Man, I have to do everything around here," she muttered angrily as she threw her backpack into the crowd with no regard for whoever got hit by it.

"I don't want to fight anyone," the boy said again. "But if you do attack either of us, I will have no choice but to resort to self-defense."

"YOU THINK THAT'LL SCARE ME?!" the huge girl rushed at him in a rage, Toder close behind, staying out of her way to avoid getting hurt himself.

* * *

"I don't believe it," Freddie said for the fifth time in the last few minutes. "Professor Negi got the girl out of Jocelyn's hands right under her nose, but how'd he do it so fast?"

"And what was up with that wind?" Gibby groaned as he picked himself up off the floor, his face even more swollen than normal. "Is that our teacher? He's gonna take on those two by himself? That's dumber than anything I've ever heard of."

"Even dumber than you?" Sam asked him in her usual obnoxious way. "Yeah, right." Gibby just looked at her dejectedly.

"Come on, we gotta do something or we're gonna have to get two new teachers in one week!" Carly beckoned them from the door. Then they saw the two bullies charge at Negi. "Oh no!" she hid her eyes.

Then, it happened.

None of them seemed to see Negi make a move, but somehow both Jocelyn and Toder were sent flying, like they'd tripped without losing their forward momentum. Then, strangely, both landed on their feet, but were forced off balance by the landing. As they watched in amazement, Toder stumbled face-first into a lamppost and Jocelyn into a loaded garbage can headfirst.

All four kids' jaws were drooping in shock.

"They … they just –" Carly said with wide eyes.

"– were both sent on a one-way flight into next week!" Sam finished for her. "Just like that!"

"Toder, I can understand – he's skinny – but that freak, Jocelyn, too?" Gibby said in disbelief. "She as huge as an Amazon with a temper to match."

"He flipped them," Freddie said, his eyes still locked on what had just transpired. "I saw it only for a brief second, but he grabbed each of their hands and flipped them over with such a light touch that they were still propelled forward. It was just like when a car stops and whatever's inside it without a seatbelt goes shooting forward. They maintained their inertia, but the way he did it, they were set to land on their feet. That much I can tell, but whatever it is about them – whether it's Jocelyn's lack of balance or Toder's lack of coordination, carried them into those positions they're in now." He turned to Carly and Sam, who were now gawking at him, as if in amazement. "What? Is there something on my face?"

But Freddie had no time to explain before things started moving again outside the Groovy Smoothie.

* * *

With the help of her two girls, Jocelyn wrenched herself out of the garbage can and by the time she'd gotten the trash out of her hair, she was fuming so badly, smoke may as well have been coming from her ears.

"I'm going to rip your head off, YOU STUPID MIDGIT!" she roared.

"Normally, I would believe that. After all, you're big … but then … I've beaten bigger." _MUCH bigger_.

With a blood-chilling scream, the bulky girl charged at Negi at full steam. But as soon as she reached him, he reached up and stopped her in her tracks with a single finger to her forehead, the same way he had stopped a certain someone not too long ago, but this time he had something different in mind.

"You don't want to fight me. It is a waste of your time," he said slowly, as if speaking directly into her mind.

"I don't want to fight this brat. He's a waste of my time," she repeated the command … mostly.

Negi raised an eyebrow. "You want to get some counseling and reconsider your way of life," he finished and withdrew his finger from her forehead.

"I need to go find a doctor and rethink what life I have," Jocelyn repeated a few seconds later.

And with that, she turned briskly on her heel and walked away, leaving Toder lying on the ground with a black eye from his head-on collision with the lamppost and Negi scratching his head in contemplation. But he had almost no time to think before Carly, Sam and Freddie ran over to him, each brimming with questions.

"What did you do to them?" Carly practically screamed in his face.

"How do you do it?" Sam asked, trying to grab him by the shoulders.

"And what was _that?_" Freddie looked close to shaking right down to his toes in excitement. "Was that some kind of mind trick from Galaxy Wars?"

Negi just chuckled. "That was just a little bit of mind control, not so far from hypnotic suggestion. Actually this is the first time I tried it. I wasn't even sure it was going to work, and I'm not even sure it worked the way it should. I still have a long way to go. But not a bad guess though, Freddie."

"But you made her leave with a touch of a finger and a few words!" Sam protested. "Correct me if I'm wrong, and I'm not, but I think that counts as a success, doesn't it? Well?"

Negi just smiled at her. "Well," he began. "It _would_ have been a success if she had repeated my commands word for word, and correct me if I'm wrong, and I'm not," he winked at her. "But I do not recall making her call me a brat and a waste of her time. Nor do I remember suggesting that she rethink what life she has, which is just plain offensive no matter who you are. Do you?" Sam could only stutter in response at being not only served her own question, but also totally out-foxed by a child. "Only a fool would consider any endeavor a success after his target insulted him as well as his or herself when he himself did not will it."

Sam could only stutter in response and Carly and Freddie applauded in awe of their junior's prowess.

"Ugh … um … Pro – … Professor?"

"Oh," Negi gasped, looking back. "Nodoka!" He raced over to the girl and cradled her head close to his chest. "Are you all right? I'm sorry I was late."

"No," she said, shaking her head. "It's not your fault. You didn't make those bullies come and make trouble for me." After that they were silent, just looking into each other's eyes, like in some bad soap opera.

"Well, ex-SCUSE me," Sam interrupted them, getting in the middle and getting in Negi's face. "You were the one who told this girl to wait for you in a place where she could get mugged? You irresponsible BRAT!"

"This is coming from the girl who racked up $526 in debt to us in less than three years of borrowing money, then spent the money _we_ were supposed to get on a trampoline and got rid of a couch to make room for it in someone else's house?" Freddie asked matter-of-factly. "This is not all that bad in comparison."

"Huh? Excuse me?" Negi could only say in confusion, large sweat drops forming on the back of his head.

"Never mind that," Carly interrupted. "Negi, who is this girl?"

"And how do you know her?" Freddie followed up briskly.

Negi just sighed. "Let's go inside and we'll explain everything."

* * *

"All right, we're inside," Sam stated the obvious when they got back to their table, once Negi had gotten past all of the cheering kids who'd seen his heroic feat. "Now what's going on?"

"Well, to answer your previous questions, this is Nodoka Miyazaki. She's one of my Japanese students. As for how we got here to the United States, it all happened when we were at the airport in Wales, preparing to depart for our return trip to Japan," Negi told them. "There was a luggage accident, and while I was helping Nodoka sort it out, the rest of my class had already bordered the plane, and by the time we were done, it was within 2 minutes before our flight left, and in a panic, we boarded the wrong flight. When we arrived here in Seattle, we realized what had happened, but had no money to get a flight back to Japan. With what money I had left, I managed to get us a room at the Parker-Nichols Hotel nearby, but we only had enough money for one or two days. That was two days ago, and now we need to find a new place to stay until the end of the month. I was lucky enough to run into Principal Franklin at the bank the other day, so I managed to secure a job at the school to earn enough money to get back to Mahora Academy in time for the next term to start."

"Huh?" all three said, confused.

"What? You didn't know?" Negi asked them. "Well –" But Nodoka put a hand on his shoulder to indicate she wanted to speak.

"Um – Well, uh, in Japan, the new term starts in October," she said nervously, her eyes on Sam, as if expecting her to lash out at her.

"Wow, cool," Sam exclaimed. "You don't have to go back to school till after Halloween."

"Sam, Halloween is the last day of October," Freddie reminded her. "And you can't go back to school in October if it's after Halloween."

"But you told me that!" she shot back at him after a brief pause.

"No, I didn't," he argued in his own defense.

"Just like you didn't cheat off me on the last math test?" she raised an eyebrow.

"That was _you_, remember? You even tried to take away my paper in broad daylight – in the middle of the test, yet! Mr. Howard looked like he'd kill at least one of us."

"Ah, you were just imagining things," she dismissed it.

"Can we get back to the topic at hand, here?" Carly interrupted them. "Please?"

"Right, sorry," Freddie apologized to their two spectators, who had gone quiet during the recent exchange. "Hey, Carly. Didn't Spencer mention an empty apartment in our building?"

"Yeah, 3–A. Why?"

Negi and Nodoka's eyes met at the sound of the apartment number. Their expressions said it all. _You've got to be joking. Our problems are solved!_

"We'll take it!" they cried, standing up at the same time.

"Whoa. What brought that on?" Carly asked in awkward confusion.

Blushing, Negi and Nodoka sat down again. "It just so happens that over in Japan, I'm in charge of Class 3–A."

"Wow. Funny coincidence," Sam said unenthusiastically.

"That's really cool," Freddie told them. "However, it's not going to be that easy. You've gotta talk to Lewbert, our doorman."

"Lewbert?" Negi echoed.

* * *

"ABSOLUTELY NOOOOOOOT!" Lewbert screamed at the top of his lungs as soon as he was asked about the vacant apartment. "Give me one good reason why I should rent out my only empty apartment to a little … Asian girl and a Kindergartener!"

"Kindergartener?" Negi in a dejected voice. _I'm not that small, am I?_

"He's our teacher, and he needs a place to stay for a month or two," Carly tried to explain for the fifth time, but the disgruntled man wouldn't seem to budge.

"Teacher? FAH!" Lewbert laughed in a shrieking manner. "You expect me to believe that this … INFANT knows more than I, an adult, do?! FAT CHANCE!"

"Infant?" Negi repeated under his breath.

Sam's patience just kept getting shorter and shorter until she slapped his desk and got in his face. "Look, Lewb. The kid needs a place to live and you haven't been able to fill that vacancy for months. Let him have it already!"

"Oh, I'll let him have it, all right. POW! Right in the kisser!" he made a fist. "You think I won't?! Maybe I didn't make myself clear to you, but I … HATE … KIDS!"

"I thought you hated people," Freddie piped in.

"THEM TOO!"

"What is the full name of the Byronic hero in the 1847 British Bildungsroman early feminist novel, _Jane Eyre_?"

"WHAT?!" Lewbert yelled, looking at Negi, who just smiled, as though challenging him to answer.

"What did you just say?" Sam was totally lost already.

"Would an infant know that the Byronic hero, a typical aspect of Gothic Fiction, of the novel _Jane Eyre_ is named Edward Fairfax Rochester, the master of Thornfield Manor, who was tricked into a most unfortunate first marriage with a violently insane woman before he meets the story's title character and falls in love all over again?"

There was a brief silence before Sam asked, "Okay, am I the only one who didn't understand a word he said?"

But nobody else was listening. They were all too focused on Lewbert coming out from behind the counter and grabbing Negi's hand. "I've prayed I would meet another man who appreciated classic literature like I once did. You need the apartment, you got it."

Carly, Sam and Freddie just looked at the two of them with mouths agape. As for Negi, he couldn't really bring himself to smile – this was the first time a man had taken him by the hand – it was really uncomfortable, but he had accomplished his first goal: secure a place to live.

"I'll take you to your new apartment, Mr. uh …" Lewbert said, getting up and getting the keys from his desk.

"Springfield. Negi Springfield," Negi replied.

"Negi? That's a weird name," the doorman whispered.

"Yeah, I get that sometimes," Negi smiled.

As the three went into the elevator, the iCarly trio just watched them go with their faces frozen in shock.

"Wow," Freddie said, recovering first. "Who knew Lewbert was so … literate?"

"Who knew Lewbert could read?" Sam breathed, still in awe at what they'd just witnessed.

* * *

"And that's it for iCarly today, men and gentleladies!" Sam happily announced later that night.

"But before we sign off for the night …" Carly started.

"There's …" Sam momentarily continued before hitting a button on her remote that triggered a graphic that announced, "BIG NEWS!" in a loud and crazy voice.

"That's right, people," Carly pointed at their fans through the camera. "This afternoon, right here in Seattle, a massive confrontation occurred."

"Only to be averted by a very special kid," Sam finished.

"Did we just say 'kid,' Sam?" Carly asked Sam.

"Yeah we did, Carls."

"Tell them why!"

"Because a hero …"

"… that's right. She said 'hero' …"

"… appeared out of nowhere and …"

" … saved an innocent girl from two massive bullies!"

Sam pressed another button and the "OOOOOOOOOOOH" track played. "Oh wait," she corrected her comedy partner. "One was massive, the other was pretty scrawny."

"Same thing," Carly laughed.

"Whatever do you mean, my fine Carly?" Sam followed up.

"The size of the bully isn't the size of their body, but the trouble they intend to cause, my good Sam."

At this, Freddie laughed silently behind his camera. _If that's the case, then Sam's the biggest bully in the world!_ "But Carly and Sam, how can we prove to our audience that this is true?" he asked them, as they'd planned at the last minute. "After all, it wouldn't be the first time people didn't believe a thing you two have said."

"I'll just pretend I didn't hear that," Sam looked at him in a weirdly passive, yet loud way.

"Anyway, folks, normally you'd hear about this on a news show," Carly smiled.

"What a snore-fest!" Sam retorted, pretending to fall asleep on her feet with canned laughter playing in the background.

"But thanks to Freddie here, who caught the whole shebang on video!"

"So after tonight, don't forget this …"

At that moment, Freddie turned around and turned the camera to face him and the girls.

"YOU SAW THIS FIRST ON iCARLY!" all three yelled into the camera at the same time.

"That's right, ladies and gentlemen –" Freddie started, but Sam cut him off.

"Shut up, camera hog," Sam shoved him aside, grabbing the camera from him in the same move. "That's right, ladies and gentlemen, you'll only find …"

"… this primo heroing …" Carly continued.

"ON iCARLY!" they both cheered loudly.

"You ready with the footage Freddie?" Carly called to their tech producer, who was still shaking the cobwebs out of his head as he took back his camera from Sam.

"I'm getting there," he replied as he reached his computer. After typing for several seconds, he spoke up. "Yup, got the footage right where it should be. I didn't have the time to review it, but I'm sure the fans won't be disappointed. Alllllllllll righty then … playback!" and he motioned to the big screen monitor that swung out at his signal.

But when the video appeared on the screen, what appeared to be facing off with the two bullies was enshrouded in a digital mosaic.

"What?!" Freddie cried, frantically typing on his keyboard, trying to make sense of it. But still the video played without getting any clearer around the censored figure.

"What happened?" Carly asked him in confusion.

"Yeah, where's the stupid video, Fredward? Don't tell me you screwed it all up!"

"N – n – no!" he said nervously. "The camera captured it exactly how it happened. I didn't put him in a mosaic! I don't get it at all!" But no matter what he did, he couldn't remove the mosaic interference.

"Uh, we're experiencing some technical difficulties right now, so we won't be able to play this awesome video this time, but we promise we'll get it to you as soon as we work it out," Carly said into the camera.

"So until next time …" Sam caught her drift.

"BYE!" they both cheered as Freddie stopped the broadcast.

"Now what happened, Freddie," Carly came around to check his computer. "I know you couldn't possibly have made a mistake that stupid."

"Gee, thanks, Carly," he said sarcastically.

But before Sam could give Freddie a piece of her mind, there was a knock on the door and Carly's brother, Spencer, poked his head in. "Hey guys, what happened just now on your show? Freddie, you couldn't have screwed that thing up _that_ bad."

"Is anyone not going to take a shot at me tonight?" Freddie half-yelled at the ceiling.

"Never mind that," Carly dismissed the topic. "Is something wrong?"

"Well," Spencer said, scratching his head. "This may sound weird, but … there's a kid here to see you, claiming to be your teacher! Pretty stupid, don't ya think?"

"What? Negi's here?" all three of them said at the same time, but before anyone could speak again, the monitor swung out again on its own.

"Uh, what's up with the monitor?" Freddie said awkwardly.

"That's what we were gonna ask you?" all three of his friends replied in unison. But before Freddie could answer, the monitor came on.

At first, it was only static, but the screen quickly became filled with the sight of no less than ten teenage Japanese girls fighting to hold back a single blonde girl who was apparently struggling to get her face in the webcam. She was shouting all kinds of things in Japanese, but at one point, the three friends were sure they heard the name "Springfield" seconds before the computer she was yelling into appeared to fall off the desk it was sitting on and broke. The screen once more became clouded by static, and the friends could only stare at each other in confusion and shock.

* * *

Well, this chapter was a challenge to accomplish, but I stuck it out, I guess I can say.

**Please review! **I think I deserve a little encouragement in the slump I'm in.


	4. Update

I apologize for the long wait, but it's nearly over. The new chapter, while unnamed at the moment, is finally underway and will be completed before the end of the month, I promise. Let it stand that no fic of mine will die unless I say so.

**Update (10/4/11): I know I promised the new chap a few days ago, but please bear with me. After 5:30 today, I'll be free to write and I'll put it on top of my to-do list. Just a few pages more - I want it to be really worth it!**


	5. Spell 4: iGet Abducted

I don't intend to make excuses for my inactivity and the fact that I haven't been on the ball lately. I've been trying to find two jobs for the price of one (Part time and full time), so my time has been pretty packed, but the chapter is finally finished, and I'm happy with it. I only hope you will be!

**Updated: 8/3/2013**

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Spencer said as he paced around the living room. "This boy is your teacher?" he indicated Negi, who was sitting on a stool by the computer on the counter outside the kitchen. He had already removed his favorite green suit and put on a casual shirt and pants.

"That's right, Spence," Freddie smiled. "And more importantly, the teacher who has _replaced_ Ms. Briggs."

At this, Spencer froze. "Did you just say what I think you said? Ms. Briggs got _replaced_?"

"Yyyyyyeah, why?" Carly asked.

"Oh God, what a day! You know when I was in her class when I was your age, there was a rumor that the school's Superintendent thought that she wasn't fit to teach English. Said she deviated too much from English Lit. too many times to refer to Irish stuff, plus her obsession with the bagpipes."

"OH, don't remind us!" Sam held her ears as though the memory of Ms. Briggs' terrible music was overpowering her.

"Sorry, it pained me for a while, too. Plagued my dreams, too. Anyway, when she heard us talking about it in Homeroom one time she got right in our faces and said, 'There is not a teacher alive who is better than me, nor one with enough guts to challenge my authority in my own classroom.' Then she gave us all detention, forcing us to listen to bad bagpipe music over the radio."

"There was a radio station that played that horrible music?" Carly exclaimed. "She never used it on us."

"Yeah, they dissolved it before long," her brother told them. "Not enough viewership, and I know I'm not alone when I say, 'Thank goodness.'"

"So you're saying that the one thing she claimed couldn't and wouldn't happen, did?"

"Exactly," Spencer smiled. "If this kid replaced Briggs, then I'll accept him outright!"

"Not only that, but he _tamed_ Lewbert. As soon as he met him, the guy lightened up. Said something about meeting someone who appreciated classic literature as he used to."

Spencer turned to Negi. "Are you a god or some kind of miracle worker? Because you just performed a miracle! Not just a miracle, if what they're saying is true, then you pulled off the impossible."

Negi laughed. "No, no. I'm not a god. I'm just a humble wi – uh, uh, I'm just a teacher." Spencer didn't seem to notice the slip of the tongue, so Negi felt relieved.

"So did you come and see Carly?" he asked Negi.

"Yes, and no," Negi said. "I came to let Carly and her friends know that I don't really appreciate being taped without my permission," he reached into a pouch behind his back and revealed a disconnected miniature camera.

"What?! My camera!" Freddie gasped. "How did you get that?"

"You were with us the whole time," Carly pointed out.

Negi just winked at them. "Sorry, but I'm not at liberty to reveal that to you."

"What? But why not?" Sam was getting angrier and angrier at his constant cleverness.

"Let's just say that a good magician never reveals his secrets," were his last words before he excused himself, leaving all four friends with drooping jaws. They stood there with jaws slack until Carly's nose twitched and she snapped out of it.

"Hey, why do I smell cheese?" she looked around.

"Oh yeah!" Spencer exclaimed. "I forgot to tell you guys. I've accepted a job from a dairy farm."

"Dairy farm?" all three friends echoed.

"Yeah. They asked me to make a sculpture of their mascot, the Jolly Cow, out of cheese. I was just putting the finishing touches on the plan when you guys got home. I had to get over 200 pounds of hard cheese from the supermarket." He indicated piles and piles of wheels of cheese in the kitchen.

"Wow, I can't believe we never even noticed that yet," Sam said curiosity. "Can I eat it?"

"No! I need it!"

"You mean you're going to be carving a cow out of cheese?" Freddie asked him, wanting to make sure he heard right.

"Yeah, so it may smell a little bad around here for about a week while I make it."

"It's gonna take a week?" Carly gasped.

"Well, yeah. After all, hard cheese is hard to carve, and cutting all that cheese is going to create quite the smell in here."

* * *

_It's good to have friends in high places_, Negi thought as he walked back to the elevator. "Chamo." Waiting by the elevator door was Negi's familiar, the little white ermine named Albert Chamomile.

"Did you see the looks on their faces when you showed 'em the camera?" Chamo laughed. "That'll teach 'em."

"All the same," Negi told him as they boarded the elevator. "Consult me before tampering with cameras in the streets next time. For all we know it could have been a police cam. Then we'd be in trouble." With that, the doors closed and they returned to Negi's apartment on the third floor.

* * *

Several days later, as the iCarly trio walked into their studio to discuss ideas, Freddie stopped his two friends. "Hey, I just got an idea."

"ALERT THE PAPERS!" Sam yelled. "Face it, Fred – your ideas are always boring. Just leave the good ideas to me and Carly."

"Oh, come on!" he crossed his arms. "Can't you give me _some_ slack here and hear me out."

"We'll hear him out, Sam," Carly broke up the fight before it started. "Worst that happens is we reject it and you take another shot at him."

"It almost makes it seem worth it," Sam sighed.

"Anyway," he started. "Since the clip of him got screwed up last time, I say we have Negi help us out with a bit to make up for it."

Sam just looked stunned, but she quickly blinked it away. "Wow, that's actually not a bad idea."

"You're right, but it's gotta be good. Something to really knock the shoes off our viewers."

"I got that all figured out," Freddie reassured her. "Just let me clear it up with Spencer." And he walked out the door.

"Wonder what he has in mind," Carly wondered out loud.

"Well, if it turns out to be as good as any bit _we've_ ever come up with, I'll eat my bra!"

"Better not let Freddie hear you say that," Carly warned her.

"Too laaaate " they heard from out in the hall. "Now I have all the more reason to make sure this goes perfectly."

"Oh no," was all Sam could say.

* * *

"Hey, Spencer!" Freddie called as he nearly charged down the stairs.

"What up?!" Spencer looked up from his sculpture, which was already half done. He was almost done with the udders, and Freddie had to be impressed with the amount of detail he had managed to put into it, despite the fact that a great deal was done with a tool that looked like it was supposed to be used for sanding wood. He guessed it worked pretty well for cheese, too. "Is something wrong?"

"No, actually, it's just the opposite," he said excitedly, hurrying over and whispering in his ear.

Spencer's mouth opened wide. "You've got to be kidding."

Grinning from ear to ear, Freddie held up a mini-tape recorder and pressed a button. "Well, if it turns out to be as good as any bit _we've_ ever come up with, I'll eat my bra!"

"You recorded it behind her back?"

"Yeah, I did!" he laughed. "Plus, she knows she can't do anything to me, or there _is_ no _iCarly_ this week."

"So what do you think you'll need?" Spencer changed the subject, not wanting Sam to hear, in case she might have been spying on them as she often did.

"Like a half sculpture of that, only mean-looking. Grrr!" he made a face. "You know like a mad bull!"

"Ooh, scary," Spencer laughed. "OK, I think I can manage that in time for _iCarly_."

"Awesome, thanks!" he headed to the front door.

"Hey, hang on!" Spencer called after him. "In return for this, I want a front row seat to whatever you've got in mind!"

"Done," Freddie laughed and headed out. "You're gonna love it!"

* * *

Negi and Nodoka were still settling into their new apartment when Freddie knocked on their door. Chamo climbed up and looked through the eyehole. "Hey, Bro! It's that tech kid, Freddie!"

"Oh," Negi looked up. "I hope he's not still too upset about the last _iCarly_." The three students (or two students, and Sam) had since told their teacher about the botched up tape, but of course, he couldn't tell them the real reason for the lack of proper picture. He opened the door. "Freddie, can I help you with something?"

"Actually, that's exactly why I'm here," he told him.

"Listen, I hope there's no hard feelings about last week's _iCarly_. I'm sorry about how the video turned out," he scratched the back of his head.

"No, it's okay. We've already forgotten about that. Actually, we'd like your help for a bit in the next _iCarly_ in a few days after school."

"What … kind of bit?" Nodoka asked, coming out of the kitchen, bringing in a tray with freshly-made tea. "Forgive me if I'm out of line, but wouldn't having an English teacher on _iCarly_ just discourage viewers?" she asked as she put the tray down on the coffee table by the chairs they were sitting in.

"No, no. Nodoka, right? You're not out of line. You're right, but we're not looking to have an English teacher on _iCarly_ – we're interested in having a magician and martial arts specialist on _iCarly_ who just happens to be an English teacher. Here, I'll explain …"

And as Freddie discussed his idea with Negi, the young boy couldn't help but laugh. "You couldn't have thought of a better name?" he asked him through a crooked smile, trying to control his laughter.

"Trust me, Professor," Freddie smiled. "On _iCarly_, it's gotten even weirder. Personally, I think Chicken Soup in the Toilet was one of the grossest bits we ever did, but it drew in quite the crowd, so it never hurts to get a little weird sometimes. Besides, I think Carly and Sam's bits, while they are very funny, their names are too self-descriptive. I think this one will be just as enjoyable for the fans, but will also add that element of cleverness."

"Well, Freddie," Negi started, "It's not as though I won't do it, but are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, Principal Franklin told me about that incident with the fudge balls and getting dismissed and all."

"It'll be okay," Freddie reassured him. "I've done all the necessary research and you're good – no chance of getting fired because of this."

"Well, okay, I'll do it," Negi finally agreed as he sipped his tea. "Now then, how 'bout it, Freddie? Join me for a spot of tea?"

"Sure, love to," Freddie picked up the other cup. "Just don't tell my mom, or she'll get suspicious of something – she always does."

All three of them laughed and made small talk for a bit longer until Freddie had to go back to set things up for _iCarly_.

"Are you sure about this, Professor?" Nodoka asked him after the door closed.

"Sure," Negi smiled. "What could go wrong?"

"Well, Neg," Chamo jumped on his shoulder. "What if your magic gets revealed somehow."

"Don't worry," Negi shushed him. "I've got it all planned out. It'll be just fine."

* * *

"HELLO AND WELCOME TO iCARLY!" Carly and Sam yelled into the camera as iCarly kicked off a few days later. It was right after school and everybody was excitedly anticipating Freddie's secret new bit.

"Now before we start the show, officially," Carly started, "We've got a special bit cooked up by our own technical producer, Freddie, that he still refuses to tell even us about. Now, Sam and I have no idea how this is gonna turn out, so let's just get right into it. Freddie?"

"Thank you, Carly," Freddie said proudly as he set his camera on a tripod, stepped in front of the camera and picked up a small remote. "HEY, everybody. Hope you're all ready for something really special. Now, you all remember what happened on last week's iCarly – we tried to showcase a video of a special young man fighting off two big-time bullies to protect an innocent girl, but something went wrong with the video. We're still not sure what, but to make up for it, I've arranged for that same boy to help us with a bit of my own design, right here and now on _iCarly_. And it's a bit I am proud to call …" he pressed a button on his remote and a colorful title flashed across the computer screen. "Can You Cut That Cheese?!"

"'Can you cut that cheese?'" Sam echoed. "And we actually thought Freddie could come up with something original?" she whispered in Carly's ear, clicking the "Boo" button on her remote.

"Just give him a chance," she whispered back.

"Now, Carly's brother, Spencer, is currently working on a cheesy sculpture, so I asked him if he could make us a little extra one just for today, and as always, he delivered. Give it up for him, ladies and gentlemen!" he said as Spencer emerged from the elevator with a covered object on a rolling tray. As Sam's remote triggered the cheers sound, Spencer brought the tray to rest in front of Freddie.

"I only had two days to put this together, so I hope it works for you," he whispered to Freddie.

"We'll make it work," he reassured him.

As Spencer stepped aside to sit down in their car prop off to the side, Freddie lifted the cover off the tray, revealing an angry bull's head made of hard cheese, carved from the shoulders up. "A bull's head made of cheese!

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time to bring out the man, or should I say, boy, who will make all this worth it! He's not even a teenager yet, but he's already a certified English teacher and a multi-degree Black Belt in martial arts! He is … Negi Springfield!"

Sam hit the applause button and Negi stepped out from behind the curtain, donning his black sleeveless fighting uniform, and a look of confidence on his face, his auburn hair tied back. "Good afternoon, everyone," he said politely, bowing to the camera.

"Isn't he cute?" Carly and Sam whispered into the camera.

"Now, Negi … do you mind if we call you 'Negi'?" Freddie asked him.

"In fact, I prefer it," Negi winked wittingly.

"On the count of three, I want you to attack this cheese bull's head with a move of your own choosing. We need you to try and split it in half, right down the middle. Can you do that?"

"I think that can be arranged," Negi smiled. "However, to save you the trouble of getting a new tray-on-wheels, I'll do it horizontally, so as to avoid slicing the cart in half along with the cheese."

"Ooooooh, someone sounds confident!" Sam teased.

"All right," Carly announced loudly. "We're in business! Sam hit the lights." And as Sam dimmed the lights, Negi took a fighting stance. But a second before he made his move, Negi slipped his hand behind his back, and snapped his fingers.

Instantly, the room went completely black. Freddie panicked and ran to check his computer, but just as he found it still online, there was a great WHOOOSH sound and everyone heard Negi yell out, "HASSAN … CHOP!"

An instant later, the lights came back on, and Negi was on the other side of the sculpture, in the midst of a loose bow, but the bull's head had not moved or changed at all. It was as though nothing had happened.

"HEY, WHAT GIVES?!" Sam started, walking over to the head to examine it. "You said you were gonna chop it in half, but I don't see any – WAAAH!" As soon as her finger touched the head, the head slipped right off the neck and fell to the floor, breaking into pieces on contact. "Wha – wha – the head, uh, the cheese, uh, what just –"

"WOW! How do you people like that?!" Freddie got right up to the camera and shouted. "He cut the cheese so well there wasn't even a line showing the cut until Sam actually touched the head!"

"I still can't believe what we've just witnessed here!" Carly exclaimed in excitement as she walked up to Negi and bowed to him. "Well done, Negi – an amazing piece of work. You have got to teach us how to do that!"

Negi just laughed. "One miracle at a time, Carly," he told her, turning to the camera. "First, let's try to improve Sam's Grade Point Average to a 2.0 or more!" Both Carly and Freddie had to choke back their laughs. "But first, how about some _cheesesteaks_?" Everyone burst out laughing at these words, forgetting completely that they were still recording.

* * *

One hour later, the five friends were hanging out in Carly's living room, still laughing about their experience on _iCarly_.

"Now _that_, I didn't see coming!" Spencer laughed over a glass of fruit punch.

"Yeah, literally," Carly interrupted. "Now that I think about it, none of us actually saw Negi slice that bull's head off. The lights went out, remember?"

"She's right!" Sam snapped. "The lights went black and we just heard him yell, 'Hassaaaaaaaan Chop!' What proof do we have that the sculpture wasn't like that in the first place?"

"Are you calling my sculptures defective, Sam?" Spencer asked her apprehensively.

"I ain't callin' 'em for dinner!" she shot back.

"HEY!" Freddie got in-between them. "We're not here to fight, okay? We were here to put on a show tonight, and we did!"

"Yeah, so how did the _iCarly_ viewers like your bit, Freddie?" Carly stepped in to change the subject.

"Finding that out right now, Carly," Freddie fired up his laptop. "I put a poll question up before the webcast to see if our viewers thought I had what it takes to come up with good bits. I specifically asked them, 'Do you think Freddie's bit tonight was better, as good, or worse than your favorite Carly/Sam bit?' And the results are still pouring in. Remember, Sam. If the results come out 'as good' or 'better,' than someone's gonna be eating some bra in the next few minutes!"

"You say that, but you have no proof I said anything about that!" she snapped at him, but then he pulled out the tape recorder and played her own quote back to her, leaving Sam open-mouth flabbergasted.

"And the results are … in!" Freddie announced. "And the verdict is –"

"Oh, hang on!' Carly stopped him at the last second. "Let me run upstairs and get the camera. I'm gonna wanna save this moment for years!" She left the room and ran upstairs.

"Are you really gonna hold me to this?" Sam asked Freddie with a hint of desperation in her voice.

"You said it, so you're gonna do it," Freddie smiled devilishly.

Negi just stayed silent, wanting no part of this bet that they appeared to have between them. _So there_ was_ an ulterior motive to having me appear on iCarly then_, he thought pensively.

Suddenly, there was a massive CRASH'ing sound from upstairs. Everyone made a run for the studio, only to arrive finding it in shambles. "What happened in here?!" Sam was freaking out. "Who did this?!"

"I don't know!" Freddie cried. "But where's Carly?!"

Spencer barely even heard him. He was in a daze, examining the walls, which looked like they'd been slashed with some huge blade. "What in the world is going on here?!"

His question was quickly answered. A small note attached to the window came loose and fluttered to the ground by Negi's feet.

"A note?" the kids exclaimed, gathering around Negi as he picked it up and unfolded it. "It says, 'I have taken your little kitty. Bring me my pretty birdie or her pure white coat will be stained with red.'"

"'I have taken your little kitty'?" Sam read it again.

"They must mean Carly," Freddie guessed.

"Gee, whaddya think, genius," she shot back at him.

"This isn't the time, you guys!" Spencer shut them up. "'Bring me my pretty birdie or her pure white coat will be stained with red.' Oh my God! Do you know what that means?!"

"Unfortunately, I do," Negi said with a grimace. "Not only do I think I know who this note is referring to, I think I know who sent it, too." He turned to leave. "This is something I need to address alone."

"HOLD IT!" all three of the others said loudly as they grabbed his arm and stopped him.

"This guy took Carly!" Spencer stated the obvious.

"And if we don't deliver this 'pretty birdie,' he's gonna kill her!" Freddie protested.

"So this involves us all, whether you like it or not!" Sam pulled Negi close to her face by his shirt. But before Negi could answer, the doorbell rang downstairs, making them all jump.

When they got downstairs, Spencer checked through the eyehole to see who had rung the bell, but he didn't see anyone. "There's no one there."

But Negi didn't listen. Pushing past Spencer, he pulled the door open and instantly, something fell upon him, something covered in blood. It was a boy, about Negi's height, with white hair. "FATE!"

* * *

I'm guessing you guys can guess who was the one who kidnapped Carly. After all, there aren't many who could do this to Fate and get away with it, so for the moment, enjoy putting your minds to the task of predicting the future story, because it will be a while before this one gets updated. I'm waaaaaaaaaaay behind on my other fics and commitments.


	6. Spell 5: Now It's Fatal!

Happy New Year, my readers. I left you hanging on quite the cliff on the last chapter, but now I've finally finished the new installment. In this one, I did take a couple of freedoms with Fate, but I hope you like what I did with him.

**Edited for errors, punctuation, and such: 2/2/2013**

* * *

Now, It's Fatal!

"Fate? Fate!" Negi cried as he bent over the young boy who had just fallen through the doorway, surveying the devastating damage that had been done. The boy's right arm had been amputated above the elbow and was tucked into the boy's shirt, which was now drenched through with blood.

"Wait, WHAT?!" Freddie panicked. "That kid's covered in –" That was all Freddie could say before he went limp and crashed to the floor.

"Not Freddie, too!" Sam said in annoyance.

"No, he just fainted from all the blood. Can't rightly blame him for that," Negi said, checking the other boy's vitals. "Spencer, you and Sam get Freddie to bed. I'll take care of this one."

"Are you sure?!" Spencer asked Negi as he picked Freddie up and hoisted him over his shoulder.

"Yes, definitely sure," Negi yelled, shooing them out of the room. So, Sam called the elevator and then she and Spencer took Freddie upstairs to Carly's room to rest. Meanwhile, Negi got busy. Taking some of Fate's blood on his right hand, he began to draw a huge hexagram around Fate where he lay. Back and forth his arm went, forming a huge circle ringed with many different magical runes. _It's too dangerous to move his body as he is now. I only just learned this spell, but I hope I can close his wounds at least!_

But just as he was finishing drawing in the last runes, the door flew open again and skinny woman with short brown hair burst in, causing Negi to stop and look up. "I HEARD SCREAMING! What's going on in here? Is my Freddie hurt?" Then she saw Negi and blanched. For seconds at a time, their eyes met, and then the woman screamed.

"MURDER! MURDER! THERE'S BEEN A MURDERRRRRR!" she shrieked at the top of her voice before Negi managed to dash over and clamp his clean hand over her mouth.

"Relax," he whispered in her ear. "He's still alive, but he needs help, and screaming is not helping." _Not to mention giving people the wrong idea._

"Mmmhhmm hmmf mmhfmm!" she squealed through his fingers, and he finally let go. "How dare you put your hands on me?!"

"The same way you dared to come in without knocking," he smiled mischievously at her. "We can skip the pleasantries for now. I need to take care of my half-dead friend."

"No, no!" she scolded him. "Let the adults handle it! I'll get my first aid kit!" And she rushed out of the apartment, not even closing the door.

Taking a deep breath, Negi made sure no one could see him, and waved his arm. The door closed and the lock clicked – no one was to see what he was about to do. He raised his arms high and began to chant, and the hexagram began to shine brightly. Seconds later, the prone body of Fate Averruncus began to glow faintly around his numerous wounds and injuries and they began to close, slowly but steadily. His arm, however, only remained separated. Negi sighed. He had had a feeling about that. He picked it up out of his shirt and put it aside just in time.

Just as the glow began to fade, the door burst open again and the same woman came back hauling a container as big as a large suitcase. "I brought the first-aid ki–" she started to say when she fully realized what she was looking at. "Wh – what? I – I don't understand! This boy was just dying a minute ago. I looked away for just a few seconds … and all of his cuts and bruises are gone." She glared at Negi. "What did you do?"

"Who? Me?" asked Negi innocently. "I haven't done anything. My dear lady, I believe you may be suffering from severe anxiety and must have been hallucinating. This boy is in near-perfect health … well, except for his arm. He lost it years ago in an accident. I was there when it happened. Dreadful experience. He just passed out from hunger is all. Once he eats something, he'll be just fine again. Let me help you with that," and he picked up the massive first-aid kit and carried it out into the hall for her. _She probably didn't notice it hanging out of his shirt. Thanks goodness for that. I'd better be sure to keep her mind off Fate._ He put his left hand on her forehead. "I suggest you go home and get some rest, drink some water and relax a bit. I can tell you have been really tense lately. Please tell me why that is." He took her right hand in his and walked her into the hallway and they crossed the hall to her apartment.

"I guess it's just been my relationship with my son, Freddie," she said slowly, as if under hypnosis. Negi wasn't using hypnosis or anything – he didn't have to. All he was doing was sending calming vibes into the woman's head to calm her down.

"Oh," Negi said, surprised. "So you're Freddie's mother?"

"Yes," she said in equal surprise as she opened her door and Negi carried the huge case inside. "How do you know my son? You're awfully young to be friends with Freddie."

"Actually, it's not just Freddie. I've become friends with his entire class. I'm advanced for my age, and we go to the same school. You see, we're actually in the same class."

"Really? Then say something smart," she looked at him skeptically.

"What is smart to one person may seem dumb to the other," he said simply. "It's all a matter of the individual's relative level of comprehension and intelligence."

After a short pause, she could only say, "Wow, that was … pretty smart."

"Thank you. I like to think so," Negi smiled at her. "Now if you excuse me, I must get back to help my friend out."

As the door began to swing shut, Negi stopped short. "Oh yes! That's right. I never asked your name. I'm Negi Springfield." He extended his hand in true gentleman fashion.

"A pleasure to meet you, little Negi. I'm Marissa Benson."

_Little …_ It took nearly all of Negi's willpower to maintain his casual smile. "The pleasure is all mine. Now I must be going."

"Hmm, what a nice young man," she whispered as the door closed behind Negi. _I wonder if his mother used . She must have! This can only mean that Freddie is capable of so much more. I have to push him even harder!_

* * *

By the time Negi walked back into Carly and Spencer's apartment, Sam, Freddie and Spencer had already come back into the living room and had moved Fate onto the couch, and Freddie and Spencer were standing behind the couch, whereas Sam was lying on the remaining couch cushion. As he came in, however, all eyes turned to him.

"Oh, everyone," Negi said awkwardly when he saw them. "Is something wrong?"

"Youuuuuuu might say that," Spencer said in a tone that would normally make a person laugh, but the look in his eyes was contradictory to such.

"By the time we got back down here," Freddie picked up where Spencer had left off. "All of the blood was gone, both from him, the floor, and everything else."

"Not to mention, we found this," Sam added, showing him Fate's severed arm. "Tucked away on a shelf. Reeeeeeeal good place to put it. Nice decoration." She then took the arm by the elbow in her right hand and proceeded to scratch her own back with it as Negi looked on in stunned amazement. "Ohhhhh yeah, that's good stuff."

But before Negi could speak up, another voice rang out. "Are you quite finished with that?"

Sam turned her head to find a pair of eyes glaring at her from less than a foot away. She screamed and threw the arm into the air, nearly getting it tangled in the ceiling fan. Spencer and Freddie were significantly surprised as well, jumping at the very sound of the sudden question.

"Well, that wasn't very nice," the boy said, catching the arm as it came down. "Well, Negi, I've found you at last." Standing up, he looked around at the three bystanders. "You sure keep some strange company."

"Yes, well," Negi scratched the back of his head, pulling up a chair to sit by him. "I'm glad you're back to normal. Er, well … almost."

"Oh, this?" the other boy said calmly, as though dismissing his lack of an arm as negligible. "It's easily remedied. The important thing is that you know what is going on."

"It's her, isn't it?" Negi asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Yes," the boy said, closing his eyes stoically. "The Demon of the God's Cry."

Negi started. "But how?! We already defeated –"

"Uh, heh–LLOOOOOOOO?!" Sam interrupted, putting a hand in-between their faces. "Have you two forgotten we exist?"

"And exactly who are you?" Spencer pulled up another chair so he could sit in on the conversation. "And how did you get here?"

"And who did … y'know, what they did to you?" Freddie finished, trying to avoid angering their guest.

The boy looked at him for a few seconds, then finally spoke. "Normally, I would not bother to give my name to people like yourselves." Despite the hurtfulness of his word choice, he kept going. "But since you're already in as deep as you are, I suppose it can't be helped."

"Wait!" Spencer stopped him. "What do you mean by, 'In as deep as we are'?"

"People like us?" Freddie echoed. "Don't lump Sam in with us!"

"Excuse me," Negi tried to get their attention.

"Would you rather be lumped in with this guy?" she shot back at him. "At least then he could use you for a shield the next time he gets assaulted."

"OK, now that is in the worst of –"

"HEY!" Negi shouted. "You asked him questions, so at least have the decency to let him speak."

"Thank you, Negi," the white-haired youth nodded, and turned to the rest. "You can call me 'Fate'. As for how I got here, I hacked into Negi's email account and figured out where he was through his last few exchanges with your school's Principal."

"Wait, you hacked his email?" Spencer exclaimed in disbelief at Fate's audacity.

"And what kind of name is Fate?" Freddie followed up.

"Better name than Fredward, Fredward," Sam retorted. "Kinda cool, actually."

"Care to rub it in any more, Sam?" he sulked in spite of himself. Then he felt Negi tap him on his shoulder.

"Actually, Fate isn't quite his real name, but I recommend you call him 'Fate,' for your own good," Negi whispered in his ear.

"What did you say, Negi?" Fate asked him from his seat on the couch.

"Nothing!"

"Anyway," Fate continued. "I was on my way to meet Negi when one block up the road, I encountered a very dangerous girl named Tsukuyomi in a dark alley. She seemed intent on _something_, but apparently she still holds a grudge against me for overwhelming her in our last … exchange."

"Huh?" Negi looked at him.

"It was before you yourself encountered her last, Negi," he threw a sidelong stare at Negi to warn him about saying anything about the Magical World. "I have to admit, she got me this time."

"So what are you gonna do now?" Spencer put his right hand to his chin as he leaned in.

"What do ya mean, 'What's _he_ gonna do now?'" Sam said, standing up. "_We're_ gonna go find her, kick that skunk bag's butt and get Carly back! Spencer, where do you keep your socks?!"

"In my top drawer, why?" he asked, getting up, but she had already gone up the stairs. "Aaaaaand she's gone. But she's right, though. We need to get her back for this, because now, it's Fatal!"

_Oh, he did NOT just say that!_ Fate massaged his forehead. _That's the worst line I've heard._

"Oh no, OH NO!" Negi declared with absolute authority. "There's no way any of you are getting involved in this!"

"Well, sorry to say it, but it's too late for that kind of talk," Spencer came out of the closet holding a baseball bat and a golf club.

"The second that girl messed with Carly, she messed with the rest of us too," Freddie pointed out, taking the golf club from Spencer's hand.

"You finally said something right, Fred," Sam said, coming out of the kitchen with a long sock filled with something that was weighting down the toe.

"Butter sock again?" Freddie and Spencer both asked with interest.

"Eeeeeyup," she smirked.

Fate let out a breath. "Well, Negi. I guess there's no alternative." He turned to his friend. "You'll have to tell them … about sorcery."

Negi looked like he was about to panic, but finally nodded sullenly. "There is no choice."

* * *

By the time Negi was finished speaking, Freddie and Spencer were both slumped over on the couch, reeling from hearing what they had heard. As for Sam, she had fallen asleep during Negi's long-winded explanation.

"That explains several things," Freddie confessed. "I thought something was strange about you, but this is totally like something out of a video game or something."

"Yeah, except this one is for real," Spencer agreed with him.

"Man, how are we gonna save Carly now?" Freddie began to sulk, when suddenly the entire room lit up in a great big flash. When the three friends had opened their eyes, Negi was glowing white, with hair longer than he was tall.

"Whoa!" was the only word that any of them could say, but Fate just looked on as passively as ever.

"As long as you have the two of us at your sides," Negi held out his hand. "You'll have nothing to worry about."

"He had to say, 'us,'" Fate groaned. "Oh well, I'd kind of like to see Tsukuyomi's face when I grind it into the dirt." He stood up to stand beside Negi.

Sam, now wide awake, reached out to touch Negi's hand, but as soon as she got close, a jolt of static electricity jumped from his hand to hers, causing her hair to become incredibly frizzy and puff out like an afro.

"Whoa!" she jumped back, but the damage had already been done.

Spencer's eyes shot open and his jaw dropped, and at the same time, Freddie burst into fits of laughter.

"That's a good look for you Sam!" he muttered in between gasps of breath. He simply could not stop laughing – he had fallen to the floor and was kicking his feet in elation. Sam had never been funnier than she was now, on or off iCarly.

Even Fate looked amused – he half-smiled in Negi's direction, though Negi pretended not to notice. Fate never _really_ smiled – his smiles, even his laughs, of before had never even extended to his eyes.

"I'm sorry, I just had to do it," Negi chuckled, the glow around him disappearing and his hair returning to normal.

"Well, I'm sorry. I just have to do THIS!" Sam tried to grab Negi but he deftly dodged her, but in doing so, a bit of her hair brushed his face, particularly his nose.

"Ah, ahh … ahh," Negi started to gasp. His eyes opened wide and he started to dart around the room, looking for a space without something breakable in it, but to no avail. By the time he dashed back into the living room, he could hold it in no longer.

"AH–CHOOOOOOOO!" His sneeze was so powerful, it blew anything that wasn't nailed down all over the living room. Crashes were heard all around, and when the dust cleared, he saw that he, Spencer, Freddie, AND Fate were in nothing but their undergarments. "Oh crum!"

"What was _that_?!" Freddie exclaimed, covering himself, but he needn't have. Sam had already covered her eyes.

"Well, that's more of any of these guys that anyone needs to see," she said judgmentally.

"Speak for yourself," Fate said, striking a corny David pose, except with his left hand against his chest, causing everyone to look at him with a "What's that supposed to mean?!" look on their faces.

"Well, I've never imagined you as one to make jokes like that," Negi laughed. _I guess Fate and I have another thing we clash about_… he thought, noting Fate's briefs.

* * *

"Wow," Spencer said as he pulled a fresh shirt over his head. "I almost didn't want to believe that magic was real, but after seeing what that sneeze did to our clothes …"

"… I guess we have …" Freddie picked up as he pulled up some of Spencer's spare pants that Negi had shrunk for him, as he didn't dare go back to his own home without his pants … or any of his other clothes.

"… No choice but to believe you," Fate finished their sentence casually, having already magically restored his clothes from the nothingness that Negi's sneeze had blasted them into – luckily, he still had the remaining material from the sleeve still on his severed arm to replicate.

"Will you STOP THAT?!" Negi said in agitation. "You explained it too, you know, so why are you finishing their sentence for them?!"

"Well, the girl doesn't exactly come across as the 'smart-enough-to-know-what-she's-being-told type,'" he answered simply.

"Well, you'd be right about that …" Freddie crossed his arms and nodded stoically.

"… And her grades would agree with you," Negi mimicked his gesture. _Oh, great! Now he's got me doing it!_

"So what are we gonna do about this?" Sam poked at Fate's severed arm.

"Do you mind?" Fate asked, taking the arm away from her.

"I am curious," Negi said, walking over, cradling his chin in his hand. "How will you reattach this without major surgery?"

"Yeah, that's what we were wondering?" Spencer shouldered his bat.

"Well, you'll just have to wonder about that," Fate replied, walking into the bathroom. He came out a minute later, his right arm back on, as though it had never been removed in the first place. "There, good as new," he said, flexing his fingers.

Everybody just looked on with wide eyes and dropped jaws. Seeing their expressions, he shrugged. "There are things humans must never know."

Before anyone could speak, there came a knock – or bang – on the door. "Freddie?! I heard a ruckus coming from over there again!" Negi heard Mrs. Benson yelling from the other side of the door. "I told you that that Carly was not worth it!"

"Oh, Mom!" Freddie moaned, making for the door, but Negi stopped him.

"I'll take care of her," he winked at him. He held up what looked like a spherical red candy drop, and flipped it into his mouth. There was a big puff of smoke, and Negi was once again a young man, like he had first appeared before them. He gestured Freddie over to the couch by the table, and mouthed silently, "Take out your notebook."

Freddie did as he was told, and catching the drift, everyone else made themselves scarce. He opened the door to find a disgruntled Mrs. Benson on the other side. "Yes, can I help you?" he asked politely.

"Yes, you can!" she didn't miss a beat, despite the handsome young man standing before her. "Where is my son?"

He stood aside, revealing Freddie sitting on the couch, writing notes in his school notebook. "Hi, Mom," he greeted her with a smile, looking up.

She glared at Negi. "What's going on? And who are you?"

"Forgive me," he smiled warmly. "I am Nagi. You may know my young cousin, Negi. He asked me to tutor your son, Freddie. You see, even though his grades are already high, there is some room for improvement, so he asked me to give him some extra lessons, so that Freddie could make you even happier with his next report card."

She gasped. "Did he really?" she looked at Freddie.

"It was my idea, actually," Freddie winked at her.

"Well," she smiled. "I see something right is finally being done in this house. Now, if only you can fix that bimbo, Carly." Before anyone could object to her calling Carly names, she walked out and closed the door.

Turning back to his normal self, Negi looked at Freddie.

"Yeah, I know," Freddie nodded in a disgusted way. "Don't listen to anything she says."

"Wow, I have to say, Negi," Spencer praised him with a little applause as he came out of his hiding place. "You are good."

"Thank you," Negi smiled. "But I'm sorry about what she said about your sister. I would have reprimanded her if I had had the chance."

"Oh, never mind," Spencer dismissed his concern. "We know how she is: completely overbearing, overprotective of Freddie to the point of being possessive, and if I may say so, very judgmental and often hurtful."

"And that's only the tip of that iceberg," Sam added, coming down the stairs.

"Wow, really?" Negi asked in awe of how blunt people were being about their neighbor. "I thought she was okay, except for one flaw, maybe two."

"No. Sadly, they're right about my mom," Freddie closed up his notebook and put it away. "Nice cover-up, by the way. Do you really have a cousin named Nagi?"

"No, actually," Negi laughed. "Nagi is my father, but I'd rather not talk about it. Long story short, I've used that name as a cover-up in the past, so it's the first thing that came to mind."

"So, getting back to the task at hand," Fate piped in, coming out of the bathroom. "We need to figure out where Tsukuyomi took your friend."

"That's right," Sam put her foot down. "She took Carly, and that doesn't fly with this bird."

"You're more of a vulture," Freddie commented on her remark.

BANG BANG BANG!

"What was that?!" they heard from outside the door. "Someone took Carly away?! 'Bout time!"

"Oh that's it!" Freddie decided. "I've had about enough of her opinion of Carly!"

But before he could open the door to yell at his mother, Negi stepped in front of him. He held out his hand, and his staff, which was propped up against the wall, flew right in to it. He pointed the staff at the door and chanted a short phrase. After a short pause, he opened the door, revealing Mrs. Benson lying facedown on the floor.

"She must have had her face pressed against the door to spy on us again," Spencer ventured a guess, picking her up and carrying her across the hall and back into her own apartment.

"What did you do to her?" Freddie asked Negi when Spencer came back in and closed the door.

"Just put her to sleep with a light touch of memory modification, something I picked up while on a trip to Scotland a couple of years ago. Quite a useful combination, I must admit. By the time she wakes up, we should be back here, safe and sound, and she won't remember a single thing that's happened in the last 24 hours."

"But won't that mean she'll forget everything about you and 'Nagi'," Freddie asked.

"Oh yeah," he said after a short, but awkward pause. "Well, too late now."

"I thought you were smart, Negi," Fate commented. "But I seem to have given you too much credit."

"Eh, what the hey?" Negi shrugged. "Anyway, Fate's right – we need to find out where she went. I'll need to explore the studio where she was abducted." He left the room and went up the stairs.

* * *

About ten minutes later, Negi came down the steps looking quite disappointed.

Everyone but Fate rushed to meet him at the foot of the stairs. "Did you find anything?" Spencer questioned him.

"Anything _incriminating_?" Freddie clarified Spencer's question.

"The place was thoroughly trashed. Slash marks everywhere – clearly the work of a Japanese sword of standard length, only confirming the identity of the attacker. The only piece of evidence that _could_ give us a lead was this," Negi said, holding up a small piece of a train ticket stub. "It's too small to show the destination, or when it was purchased." He walked over to the couch and sat down. "We still have nothing to work with."

"Negi! Hey, Negi!"

Everyone looked around to find a small white rodent coming toward Negi. "Chamo!" Negi exclaimed. "When did you get up here?"

"Oh, I've been lurking around, listening to what's been going on," the rodent said, to everyone but Fate's amazement. "By the way, I was watching your bit down here right under Spencer's nose. 'Hassan chop!' HAHAHAHAHA! Negi, you've been watching too many cartoons, little man!"

Negi pinched his mouth. "We can talk about that later, Chamo," Negi smiled threateningly. "Now can you please tell me why you're here now?"

Chamo jumped down to table and grinned, pulling out a cigarette. "And you call yourself my Magister, Negi? How sad. I thought you knew me. Tell me, Negster, did you find any scraps of clothing? Preferably one from Carly's outfit."

"Only a small one," Negi said, puzzled. "Why?"

"Well then, go get it!" he slapped Negi's face with his tiny paw. "I'll explain when you get back."

As Negi raced back upstairs, everybody crowded Chamo, curious about the nature of this wondrous creature.

"Are you a mouse or a rat, 'cause I've never seen a rat like you before?" Sam put here face close to him.

"Back off, toots, you botha me!" he shot back at her. "Besides, I'm not a rat or a mouse, I'm an ermine!"

"Yeah, a _talking_ ermine!" Freddie gasped, grabbing his PearPhone. "I've got to get this on video!" But Chamo grabbed the phone.

"Listen, Buster! I don't mind you asking me questions, but trying to get me on camera is a big no-no! If magic and talking animals are exposed to the public, Negi will be arrested, turned into an ermine like me, and given a life-sentence in an ermine work camp! So if you really care about him, no yakkity-yak-yak on iCarly about it either, capiche?"

"Yeah, I'm cool with that," Spencer said.

"If he'll be punished for it, then my lips are sealed," Freddie agreed.

"Well, I could be persuaded to promise that, if –" Sam started to say, but Chamo jumped on her shoulder.

"Look, sister," he pointed at her face. "If you don't swear to it, I'll humiliate you like you wouldn't believe!"

"Like you could ever touch me," she scoffed, and flicked him off her shoulder.

"THAT'S IT!" Chamo whipped out a lighter and a roll of some kind of cord from behind his back and lit it. "ERMINE FLASH!" The room was suddenly filled with a great blinding light that lasted for several seconds.

When Freddie and Spencer opened their eyes again and saw Sam, they laughed and laughed. Sam had been transformed into a Japanese schoolgirl, complete with miniskirt and ribbons in her hair. He had also applied mascara to her face to add to the look. He waved Negi's cell phone aloft and snapped a picture.

"Wait'll the guys on Splashface see this!" he teased her as she tried to grab him. "You'll be an internet idol, but for a whole new reason!" he laughed as she chased him around the room. "Now everyone can see your boxer shorts!"

Fate just shook his head in embarrassment. _Negi keeps such strange company_.

"What's going on in here?"

Everybody looked up to see Negi coming down the stairs. He motioned to Chamo and held up a small scrap of cloth.

Chamo jumped up and grabbed it. He held it to his nose and took a long, strong sniff. Finally, his eyes shot open. "If I've got my distance right, I'd say she's abouuuuuuuuuut 65.49 kilometers away, give or take a tenth or so … and they're still moving in that same direction. Probably flying, I would guess."

"Chamo, I had no idea you could do that?" Negi crouched down, his eyes sparkling in awe of his companion's gift. "Wait, what about the direction?"

"I think it's Southwest. Wait, no. South by Southwest, yeah that's it," he crossed his tiny arms and nodded proudly. "And that, children, you can take to the bank!"

"Wait a minute!" Spencer gasped. He dashed to the computer and pulled up a map page. "Let's see … 65.49 km South by Southwest … Well, right now they must be over water, but if they keep going like you said in a straight line, then – OH MY GOD, NOOO!" he staggered back, only to trip over his own two feet and fall to the floor with a crash.

"Gee, Spence," Freddie laughed, casually walking over to the computer. "What could be so – AHHH!" he followed Spencer's lead and fell to the floor beside him.

"OK, what the flip is wrong with the two of you?" Sam grouched, walking over and looking at the screen. "It's just a line from Seattle to Olymi – OH! I see what's going on here."

"Well, whatever has them so afraid can't be that bad," Negi decided, heading for the door. "Now come on then. The sooner we get to Olympia, the sooner we can get Carly back."

"No way!" Freddie yelled, looking frantic. "There's no way I'm going back there! If it's Olympia, it can only mean one thing!"

All three looked at each other and seethed, "Nora!"

* * *

At that moment, outside the Washington State Women's Penitentiary, a certain sound could be heard.

"Heh heh. Hee hee hee!"

Then, with a flash of cold steel, stone walls fell open like freshly cut paper. After that, all that could be heard was the sound of alarms.

* * *

"But that's impossible!" Spencer protested. "Nora and her family are all in prison for what they did to us!"

"Well, not anymore," Fate pointed at the TV. "I suggest you turn on the news."

"No, wait, hold on, I wanna see this!" Sam said, having turned on the TV, probably to cope with what she had just learned.

"When I say 'suggest,' it means you had better shut up and do it," Fate took the remote from her hand and turned on the news as everyone gathered around the TV.

"– can only be described as a full-scale riot," the newscaster was saying as the channel changed. In the upper left-hand corner, it showed a still of the State Penitentiary with several huge cracks along the sides and more than one smoothly cut hole along the cellblocks. "Only minutes ago, something swifter than a hurricane and yet, sharper than any knife cut straight through the walls of several cellblocks, setting off a chain reaction of pure chaos in the prison. Several dangerous women have been confirmed as escaped, but authorities are confident that they _will_ be caught before they get too far."

At these words, Freddie slumped onto the couch. "Well, that's a load off my mind."

"Yeah," Spencer sighed. "THAT really scared me for a second there."

"Grown men should not be scared so easily," Fate pointed out. "You really have a weak constitution, don't you?"

"Shh," Negi hushed them as the newscaster began speaking again.

"This just in! The majority of the would-be escapees have been detained, but among the unaccounted-for inmates are Nora Dershlit and her mother, who suspiciously were sharing the same cell at the time of the disaster. The two were arrested only a month ago for the crimes of kidnapping and holding several people against their will. Authorities are still investigating the cause of the destruction, believing it to be …"

"Well, I think that answers everything," Negi said, switching off the TV. "For some reason, Tsukuyomi has attacked the Women's prison and has apparently released this 'Nora' person. Tell me, what is she to you?"

"Well," Sam said, pushing Negi and Fate down on the couch. "I guess it's our turn to do the explaining."

* * *

If there is any confusion from the Nora Element, then please consult the iPsycho and iStill Psycho episodes of iCarly. If you need to find them online, I recommend TV-Links . eu. I use that site all the time.

Otherwise, I hope everyone enjoyed the humor I decided to work into this one. I've been told time and again by friends that Negi should have sneezed by now, but the problem with that was, every time Negi sneezes, a girl gets stripped, and that isn't supposed to happen on iCarly, so I went for the next best thing: strip the guys! Plus I highlighted another controversy between Negi and Fate: boxers vs briefs, because you know that could easily happen. Akamatsu-sensei simply hasn't decided to do it. I figured if he tried to hold it in, the explosiveness of his sneeze could reach atomic levels. I figure I could have had it do more damage, but I decided to give Spencer a break, since he'll have to pay to get everything fixed.

If you loved this chapter, or even if you liked it, **don't stay silent! LET ME KNOW! Review or PM me so I can hear your voices.** iCarly listens to their viewers and adds to their content based on what the viewers like, so I want to be able to do the same.


	7. URGENT MESSAGE!

**This is an urgent message to all my loyal readers!**

**As most of you are probably aware, the US government is due to vote on the PIPA and SOPA bills soon. These bills will allow the government to personally regulate the Internet and its content to an unprecedented extent. Countless sites could be taken down indiscriminately, jobs will be compromised, the economy may suffer further, and the 2nd Amendment rights of people all over the world will be virtually null and void.**

**In addition to this, this fine site, Fan Fiction, just might be targeted as well by the government. That would be equivalent to taking away our literacy, our ability to read and write as we choose.**

**DON'T LET WHAT HAPPENED TO MEGAUPLOAD AND ALL ITS NON-INFRINGING USERS BE REPEATED!  
**

**THIS MUST NOT COME TO PASS, OR EVERYONE WILL REGRET IT LATER!**

**I URGE EVERYONE WHO READS THIS MESSAGE TO REACH OUT TO THEIR STATE REPRESENTATIVE(S) IN CONGRESS HOWEVER YOU CAN AND VOICE YOUR OPINIONS TO THEM!**

**DON'T LET SOPA OR PIPA PASS, OR AMERICA WILL BECOME THE WORLD'S MOST HATED COUNTRY, AND I DON'T JUST MEAN OTHER COUNTRIES WILL HATE US - WE WILL HATE US FOR ALLOWING IT!**

**Don't believe me? You have been warned!**

******This also stands for folks in other countries, such as Europe, whose EU Parliament is discussing ACTA. Don't let the freedoms of the Internet be a thing of the past!**


	8. Spell 6: Psycho Convention

Hello, readers. I know I've kept you waiting a long time since my last update, and once again, I have no excuses to make. Lots of things have been going on and I have been forced to devote more time to things such as my current jobs with Book Reporter (ed. intern) and Graphic Novel Reporter (manga reviewer), as well as finding a full-time paid job.

However, the time away has done wonders for my brainstorming skills when it comes to getting ideas that will keep you guys happy. I hope you enjoy this new installment. The iCarly gang will get their first look at their enemy, and we'll see Nora for the first time since her arrest in _iStill Psycho_.

To any fans of Negima! out there, I, for one, was rather disappointed with the conclusion of the Negima! manga - anticlimactic and less informative than it should have been. We can only hope Akamatsu decides to do something more with it someday. There's always the movie …

**Edited for error: 6/25/2013**

* * *

Psycho Convention

"Wow," Negi said, practically reeling as Sam, Freddie and Spencer recounted their past experiences with Nora Dershlit, the most diabolically psychotic fan they have ever been forced to spend an extended time with. "That must have been quite the ordeal."

"The second time was far worse," Freddie pointed out. "The first time, we were able to trick her and send for help. The second time, he had us all trapped, Gibby included, plus her parents were in on it."

"And they were just as nutty as Nora," Spencer added. "Her mom tied me to a torture wheel and spun me on and off for almost a whole day. I had to pee the whole time!"

"Didn't need to hear that," Negi put a finger to his temple, wishing he could unhear what he'd just heard.

"If it hadn't been for Freddie's mom being so crazy and obsessive as to plant a tracking chip in Freddie's head, we might never have gotten out of that situation," Sam finished. "We want nothing to do with that psycho family!"

"Sorry to prove you wrong," Fate commented from his seat in the kitchen, setting down his cup of coffee. "But if you want to get your friend back, you have to face them again. Or would you rather she die as a result of your cowardice?"

"When do we leave?" Freddie answered the question with his one of own, one that he was sure was on everyone else's minds as well.

"Do we go by car or train?" Spencer said simply, grabbing his bat.

"We'll leave immediately," Negi sprang to his feet. "The train will be faster, so take it to Olympia, and we'll meet you there." He whipped out his cell phone.

"You're not coming with us?" Sam walked up to him. "You start talking about how Carly's gonna die if _we_ don't go save her, but _you_ just chicken out like this?"

"Who said anything about chickening out?" Negi asked her with a hint of defensiveness in his voice. "I'm simply going to make an arrangement for someone to meet us there."

"Someone you know?" Spencer asked, grabbing his coat.

"The 'pretty birdie,' I take it?" Fate guessed.

"You'll see."

"Come on, come on, let's go," Sam shoved Freddie out the door with Spencer on their heels.

* * *

By the time Spencer's car pulled into the train station parking lot and everyone climbed out, they found Negi and Fate already standing on the platform.

"You're late," Fate commented dryly.

"We're late?" Sam sputtered. "How the heck did you get here before us?"

"Flew."

"FLEW?!" Freddie said with wide eyes. "How?"

"What did you think this was for?" Fate indicated Negi's staff. "Decoration?"

"Then why didn't you simply fly _us_ here?" Sam yelled.

"Two-person ride," Fate dismissed her angry inquiry.

"Liar," all four, Negi included, whispered to each other.

"Call me another name and I'll turn you to stone," he turned around. _Maybe I should even if she doesn't. Least that way, I wouldn't have to listen to her big mouth._

Seeing the look on their faces, Negi waved his hand. "He doesn't really mean that."

"But I do," his associate contradicted him immediately. "You see, Negi, I don't like being insulted. And that goes for you, too, by the way." Negi just laughed awkwardly.

"We've taken the liberty of securing round-trip tickets for you," Negi held up their train passes. "So you three can get there and back safely with Carly in tow. Like before, we'll meet you there."

"So no dying en route," Fate told them, walking over to a nearby puddle. "Once they're used, they become non-refundable." He stepped in, and for a moment, the water swirled around his body. In the blink of an eye, he was gone.

"Wow!" Sam gasped. "If I could do that, think of the possibilities!"

"I am, and none of them are good," Freddie spoke out the side of his mouth, earning him a knuckle-grind to the head.

"Oh! There's the train," Spencer called out as a train pulled into the station. "I'll pay you back for these." He took the tickets from Negi with a smile and all three made a beeline for the train. "HOLD THE DOOR, PLEASE!" Negi heard Spencer shout as the doors were about to close. "IT'S A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH!"

* * *

As Negi watched the train pull away, a huge sweat drop formed on his head, but there was no time to be embarrassed or weirded out. He whirled his staff off his back and took to the air.

"Well, time to get to work," Negi opened his cell phone and put it to his ear as he soared through the clouds. _Good thing it's night, so I won't be so easily seen_, he thought, hoping searchlights didn't turn on just to spite him. "Yes, Headmaster Konoe, are the arrangements being made?"

"Yes, Negi," the elderly man's voice rang through. "Mind you, this spell's effectiveness is shaky at best. You'll only have a window of three seconds to summon Setsuna, and we can only do this once, understand? You'll have to use the pactio card to align your energies with each other and summon her the instant they align. Are we clear?"

"Yes sir!" Negi confirmed, taking Setsuna's card out of his jacket pocket. "Ah, there's the train!" He lowered his speed to match the trains and slowly descended to land lightly on the last car. He teetered briefly, but quickly caught his balance and put his staff back on his back.

"_Telepathia_." He held the card to his forehead with his left hand and biting into his right thumb, getting a nice amount of blood going before his skin closed up. "Setsuna, can you hear me?"

"It's good to hear your voice again, Professor," came the response. "We've all been worried about you – some more than others, of course."

"Have you been briefed?" he spoke quietly, drawing a large circle on the roof of the car.

"Yes. It's her again, isn't it?"

"She wants you. That much is certain. 'Give me my pretty birdie or the girl's white flesh will be stained red.' The message is clear enough." He heard a groan in response as he drew the last line and started on the runes.

"That girl will be the death of me one day or another," Negi heard his student sulk. He could only chuckle in response as he wrote the last sign.

"Negi, Setsuna, get ready!" he heard the Headmaster call out. "Synchronize your energies now."

Negi shut his eyes in concentration. He envisioned a spectrum in his mind, and their energies as two orbs bouncing from one side to the other. He had to commence the summoning when he felt they were perfectly matching up, when their wavelengths matched, or the summoning would fail. As the seconds passed the orbs started to slow down as their energies neared the same wavelength. _Just a little more_…

A second later, his eyes flew open. "That's it!" He threw the card skyward. "_Evocem te, Setsuna Sakurazaki!_"

The hexagram glowed brightly, so brightly, he was sure the light could be seen for miles, so he hoped no one would connect it with abnormal phenomena. Within seconds, the light began to take the form of a young girl. When the form was complete, the light burst into countless tiny sparkles and Setsuna Sakurazaki came into being.

"Ah, Setsuna!" Negi reached out his hand to catch the young swordswoman as she instantly got caught in the strong wind. "I'm glad it worked," he sighed as he pulled her safely back onto the roof. "Everything come through okay?"

"Yes," she smiled warmly. "Think I might have left my stomach behind, though. What a trip. By the way, Professor, how did you manage this? The pactio card only works within a small effective range for telepathy and summoning."

"I'll explain everything in a second," he said, dispelling the hexagram so no one would find it afterwards. "We should get inside. At least then, we won't have to yell to hear each other!"

* * *

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Sam paced back and forth along the isle as the train sped towards it destination.

"What do you mean?" Spencer called out defensively. "If we don't, Carly really could die! Do you think that freakazoid, Nora, would not stoop to that?!"

"No! I totally get that," she shot down his assumption. "I'm just not sure we should trust two kids to help us out with this. I mean, we're older, so we should be doing the leading."

"I disagree with that," Freddie piped in. "From what we heard from Negi, not only has he dealt with psychopaths even crazier than Nora, but he has the power to back it up. I mean, you saw how he took out Toder and that Amazon Jocelyn without batting an eyelash."

"Wait a minute," Spencer interrupted him. "He beat Toder?"

"Yeah, that's true," Sam acknowledged his point, ignoring Spencer. "But how can we be sure he has the muscle to back up his claims?"

As soon as she finished speaking, a _THUD_ sounded from outside the door. As they looked up, the door swung open and Negi walked in, followed by a skinny Japanese girl dressed in a short-sleeved collared white shirt with a red necktie and a plaid skirt with dark knee-high stockings and brown shoes. Her raven hair was tied in an unusual side-braid. She had a serious expression and carried a rather long, thin wooden case. It was curved, so Freddie and Spencer assumed it was a sword, but it seemed a little longer than the ones they'd seen in Japanese museums during their previous overseas trip to the Orient.

* * *

"You know, you've really outdone yourself, Nora!" Carly seethed from where she hung in the basement of Nora's house. She was tied up and suspended from the ceiling with ropes around both arms and feet. There were also ropes wrapped around her body is a rather twisted way. "And what's with this body binding?! I didn't know you were into that kind of thing?"

"You misunderstand me, Carly," the giggling Nora moaned as she tightened the leg ropes to the floor. "I'm just doing what my Mistress wants. But don't fret." She ran a finger along Carly's cheek, but kept it clear of her mouth, expecting to have it bitten if she got too close.

"Mistress?!" _What?_

"Once my Mistress …" she went on, "… has what _she_ wants, I get what _I_ want."

"And that is…"

"You! You, Carly Shay!" Nora screeched. "And," her voice went quiet. "Since you're here, your two friends and brother will be here sooner or later, and when they get here, my mother and I have something very special waiting for them." She started laughing creepily, starting low, and getting louder.

"You have absolutely lost it!" Carly yelled, struggling with her bindings. "You know that? If I ever get down from here, prison will be the least of your worries!"

"Ahhhhh, but you won't be getting down," Nora's face was only inches from hers. Carly could now completely see how prison had changed her. Her face had several scars on it, probably from cellmates, and her hair was in such a mess that there was clearly no point in even trying to straighten it – it did seem to suit her new personality well enough. "I'm going to make sure you and your friends are nice and comfortable here, because you will be doing iCarly from this basement from now on, forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever …"

_Oh God, kill me now!_ Carly could only think as Nora's voice echoed within the small, empty basement. "First, that giggling, sword-slinging grade schooler and now this freako disastroid! What is this?! Some kind of freaky psycho convention?!"

* * *

As soon as she saw Negi's "team," Setsuna leaned in and whispered to him, "Why are there ordinary civilians with you?"

"I didn't have a choice," he whispered back. "The girl is their best friend/sister, so even if I had gone without them, they would have followed me."

"So who's this?" Sam said loudly, walking over to Setsuna. "This …" she snorted, looking Setsuna over, "… is your ace in the hole? This … _toothpick_ is supposed to help us save Carly?"

"Sam, you probably don't –" Spencer tried to put his hand on her shoulder.

"Shut up, Spencer! I got this!" she shot back, shrugging his hand off. "This skinny chick is his hidden ace? I'll bet you she can't even lift that sword! I knew we shouldn't have trusted him. We can save Carly all by ourselves, just like I said. I mean, one swing of this, and this chick is going –" she pulled out her butter sock and was about to bring it around when a sharp _WHOOSH_ sounded in her ear. Seconds later the butter sock landed on the floor at Freddie's feet. As she was looking back, she heard a slight _CLICK_ and looked around to see the girl unfurl a long sleeve of cloth and insert the sword into it, then sling it over her shoulder. Then she looked down at her hand and gulped – the sock had been cut clean through less than an inch under her clenched fist.

The girl walked over to a seat across from Freddie and Spencer, eyeing the dumbfounded Sam as she went, and sat down, muttering something in Japanese.

"What did she say?" Sam grabbed Negi's suit and asked him.

Laughing awkwardly, Negi answered, "In Laymen's terms, she said, 'Idiots like this don't belong in our world's affairs.' I guess I should have warned you about her swordsmanship." _I'm just glad she didn't lose her whole arm with that cut. Impressive as ever, Setsuna's self-control._

Freddie leaned in close. "That was awesome," he whispered quietly. "I've never seen anything like it!" She simply smiled back at him as Negi cleared his throat.

"Everyone, I'd like to introduce, Setsuna Sakurazaki, another of my students from Japan. Seeing as we are up against a swordswoman as dangerous as Tsukuyomi, I thought it prudent to bring in another swordswoman who has experience with our enemy." Setsuna bowed politely in greeting. "Setsuna here has defeated Tsukuyomi in the past, you see, and thus knows her better than any of us."

"Hi," Freddie greeted her.

"Nice to meet you," Spencer held up a hand.

"Setsuna, this is Spencer, the brother of Carly, the girl who was kidnapped," Negi gestured toward Spencer. "And these are Freddie and Sam, two of the students I've been teaching for the past few weeks."

"Yes, I know you two," Setsuna said curtly. "A friend of mine is fond of your show. I confess I've never had much of a taste for your kind of humor."

But as they all talked, they were unaware of what was going on in the skies above them.

* * *

"Hee hee hee. Hit on your first shot."

"Yes, Mistress." A dark figure held out its hand and flames began to swirl.

* * *

"So how long have you trained with swords?" Freddie asked Setsuna. He had since crossed the isle, and was sitting next to her, genuinely interested in her swordsmanship.

"Since I was a child," she replied, blushing slightly. "I was fortunate enough to be trained by the father of a dear friend. He taught me everything I know about –" She stopped midsentence and looked straight at Negi, who, at the same time, met her gaze.

"I sense it, too," he nodded. "Time to go!"

"Go?" Spencer got up. "You mean as in, 'go' go?"

"I mean 'go' as in get out of here now before we ourselves die a horrible death!" Negi yelled, grabbing Sam and Freddie by the arms. "Setsuna!"

"On it," she said as she went straight for the wall, her sword slicing through the metal walls and the windows like a knife through butter. The pieces fell away instantly, revealing what looked like two figures floating in the sky. Suddenly, one lit up with fire.

"Time to go," Negi whispered. "NOW!" He took Sam and Freddie by the arms and ran straight for the hole, leaping straight into the open air. He kicked his staff off his back. Controlled by Negi's mind, it swept down beneath his feet as Negi came down on it, balancing as though he were on a surfboard. Looking behind him, he saw Setsuna fly out of the train with Spencer on her shoulder, a large pair of white wings fully extended from her back.

"You've got wings?!" Spencer gasped. "Wow, that is SO cool!" Setsuna just blushed. Not too long ago, she had had great contempt for her wings, believing they made her look like a monster.

They both headed straight to the ground to let their passengers down a safe distance from the tracks on a grassy field alongside a large lake. No sooner had they both landed than the train was engulfed in a sea of flames and exploded, sending debris raining down from above in every direction. They had no choice but to drop their rescuees rather unceremoniously.

Spencer pulled Sam and Freddie to the ground, keeping their heads down as Negi and Setsuna drew their weapons to deal with what falling debris that came too close.

"_Shinmei-Ryu Hiken! HYAKKA RYORAN!_"

"_Sagitta Magica Series Lucis!_"

Countless little beams and balls of light jumped from Setsuna's sword and the air around Negi, striking anything within a 20 ft radius, either diverting or destroying scraps of metal, glass, wood, and anything else that came near.

As soon as the debris stopped falling, Negi pointed to the sky. "Up there!"

"I'm going." Setsuna spread her wings and took to the air like a bullet toward where Negi had indicated. She was, however, met quickly with another sword.

CLANG!

The sound of metal on metal split the silence of the night, and as Setsuna struggled with the blade blocking her path, the moonlight revealed her adversary's face. "Tsukuyomi!" she seethed furiously. "You never give up."

"Nope," the little girl giggled in ecstasy as their blades strained. "I won't stop coming back until you belong to me, Setsuna-sempai."

"Just surrender," Setsuna groaned. "You lost to me in the Home World, and you'll lose to me again!"

"Hardly," Tsukuyomi smiled, breaking the stalemate. "We'll meet again, but before I leave, Homura?"

"What?" Setsuna blinked in shock and looked up and the face of their other attacker was revealed.

"Yes, Mistress," the young fire sprite droned in a dry, unemotional voice, quite unlike her usual fiery, passion-filled tone. Her hair began to inflame itself, but before she could attack, a hand grabbed Homura's wrist and she stopped immediately.

"For shame," Fate sighed, glaring at Tsukuyomi. "I was wondering what was taking Negi and his friends so long."

"Ah, Fate-han, you've arrived at last," the sword-wielding child smirked. "How's that arm?"

"Tsukuyomi, you've lost your touch," he ignored her taunt. "Blowing up an entire train to kill five people and failing miserably. And now I find you've brought my associates into this. Turning them into puppets with these sutras?" He reached under her top and pulled a slip of paper off her back. The girl instantly lost consciousness and fainted into Fate's arms. "I expected more of you."

"Oh, you're no fun, Fate-han," Tsukuyomi pouted as she pulled out another sutra, "See you soon, sempai," and she disappeared, leaving them with nothing but the sound of her giggling.

* * *

"Is everyone okay?" Negi asked as he helped Sam, Freddie and Spencer to their feet.

"Yeah, I think so," Spencer staggered, his head still ringing from the explosion. "Just a bruise of two."

"Did you have to drop us like that?" Freddie said apprehensively as he pulled himself to his feet.

"Would you rather be a Fredward on a skewer?" Sam pointed to a steel beam that had landed less than two yards away as she stood up. "Hate to admit it, but if they hadn't dropped us like that and grabbed their weapons, we have ended up like a smoked turkey at one of my mom's Thanksgiving dinners."

"Professor!" Negi looked up and saw Setsuna lowering herself to the ground like a bird coming in for a landing. "Everyone alright?"

"Yes, we're fine," Negi nodded. "No major injuries. Where's Tsukuyomi?"

"Retreated," Setsuna looked up at where her fellow swordswoman had been only moments ago.

"Who was that with her?" Spencer walked up. "And was I just seeing things, or was that girl's hair on fire?"

"No, you weren't just hallucinating, Spencer," Negi nodded to him. "That was undoubtedly one of Fate's acolytes, a girl going by the codename, 'Homura'. She is a fire sprite from the Magical World where Fate comes from. We still don't know her real name."

"Speaking of Fate, where is he?" Sam looked around. "Last I saw him, he was up there holding that 'Homely' girl or whoever." Everyone ignored her terrible pronunciation.

"He said he was taking Homura 'somewhere safe' and then he disappeared into the lake," Setsuna told them as her wings disappeared.

"Retractable angel wings … nice," Spencer commented. "So how are we gonna get to Carly now? The train is … no more and we have no access to a car."

"I don't know," Negi put his head in his hand. "Even with my staff I can only take two at a time, but we would need to maintain stealth, and it's hard to tell where we're going while staying hidden at the same time. I think we should find the road and start walking. You never know – maybe something good may still happen."

"If you're hoping for a miracle, I'd say we've got more of a chance of Nora coming to her senses about committing her crimes," Freddie hung his head as they started walking.

"No," Negi put a hand on his shoulder. "I have a really good feeling about this." _Or at least, that's what I want to say._

* * *

After walking for ten minutes they finally found a road, and with Chamo's ability to detect Carly's scent, they were soon back on the road. However, it was slow going, and no cars were willing to stop and help them.

"This is hopeless," Freddie sulked. "If we don't get there soon, that sword-girl might get impatient and hurt Carly."

_I'm more worried about her doing another sort of thing to her_, Negi thought, and from the look in Setsuna's eyes, he knew they both shared the same fears. "Stay positive, Freddie," he urged his student, but his heart was becoming heavy as well.

"_Negi!_"

Negi's eyes widened as a huge limousine screeched to a halt right next to them. Before any of them could say a word, the door opened and out jumped Nodoka.

"Is everyone okay?" she practically threw herself on Negi. "I was so worried when I saw the explosion. Is anyone hurt?"

"No, Nodoka," Negi eased her worries. "We're just fine. As you can see, we had some backup." He indicated the tall girl standing beside him.

"Oh, Setsuna!" Nodoka's face lit up. "It's great to see you. How did you –"

"We can discuss that later," Negi put his hands on her shoulders. "More importantly, how did you find us?"

"Well, I kind of read your mind behind your back, since you were gone for so long," she said, looking ashamed. "I learned the basics of what the situation is, but by the time I rushed to 8–C find you, you had already left. So I started walking," she looked down, and Negi saw that her shoes were extremely worn. "I was about to lose hope, but all of a sudden this car pulls up and these wonderful people offered to help me find you guys."

She stepped aside to reveal their guest, and Sam, Freddie and Spencer's eyes nearly popped out of their skulls.

"You?!"

* * *

Translation notes:

_Telepathia_ - telepathy (rather self-explanatory)

_Evocem te_ … - Come forth …

_Shinmei-Ryu Hiken! HYAKKA RYORAN_ - God's Cry School Hidden Blade! Chaos of a Hundred Flowers

_Sagitta Magica Series Lucis_ - Magic Archer Array of Light (or something to that effect)

_-sempai_ - upperclassman, an honorific for a senior student of the same school, in this case, of swordsmanship

_Homura_ - flame, true name unknown, probably permanently

_-han_ - Tsukuyomi speaks with a Kansai dialect and pronounces her "san's" with an "h" instead

* * *

HA! How's that? I'm back and just as good as ever, and that cliff-hanger would make many an author proud.

Whether you can or cannot guess who their saviors are, you will be shocked come the next chapter, but for now, you can try. Can't guarantee I'll tell you anything until the next chapter, but hey, worth a try, right?

**Don't forget to REVIEW!**


	9. Spell 7: We Shall Be VICTORIOUS!

I'm sorry I made you guys wait so long. I've had some ... things to deal with – sources of stress, personal issues ... video game addictions (Pokemon Conquest, I must confess – it's very addictive), plus being responsible for attending Red Carpets for America's Got Talent (I guess working two years as a blogger for no money has its perks eventually) – it's fun talking to the judges, but I must confess, Howard Stern is VERY intimidating up close. I fear I might be starting to lose my fan fiction touch, so I'm going to try and give it my best from here on in, because the action will start soon enough. Please continue to support me while I sort out these issues.

You may have noticed I've switched it to a T Rating recently – because I've added Tsukuyomi to the mix, and all Negima! fans know how she is – I felt it was the right thing to do. I'll keep things restrained, for both obvious and non-obvious reasons.

I know some of you are mad at me for leaving you with a cliff-hanger on the last chapter. I hope this makes up for it.

**Edited: 8/02/2013**

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to Victorious.

* * *

We Shall Be VICTORIOUS!

"Tori Vega?!" Sam gasped as the dark-haired girl jumped out of the car and raced over to meet them.

"What going on?!" the long haired girl panted as she came out to meet them. "What was that explosion? Is everyone alright?" Then she got a good look at everyone. "Hey, where's Carly?"

"There's no time," Freddie told her. "We have to get moving. We'll tell you everything on the way." And everyone started toward the car, except for the child, who stood back.

"Wait! On the way where?" Tori tried to ask, but no one seemed to care to answer.

"It's like he said," the boy said as he passed, momentarily resting a hand on her shoulder. "We'll explain while en route." He and the two Japanese girls climbed into the car and Sam poked her head out.

"Don't just stand there, girl! This is an emergency!" she beckoned Tori into the car. "Let's get a move on!"

"Emergency? Why? What happened?" she asked as she climbed in and closed the door.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Tori said ten minutes later. "Some crazy girl kidnapped Carly and she's being held in Nora Dershlit's house?"

"Yeah," Spencer rubbed his head. "Snatched her right out of the studio."

"And left the place a wreck in the process," Freddie added. "Now we gotta save her, before –" At that moment, his cell phone went off, causing him to nearly jump out of his seat.

"Answer it. Then, hold it away from your ear," Negi told him. "So we can listen. When you talk, be nonchalant. We don't want her to know what's happening on our end." He then touched the button for the intercom. "Stop the car, please," he asked the driver, who pulled over to the side of the road.

Freddie nodded and did as he was told. "Hello?" he said intently.

A snort came through the other end. "Hello? Is this Freddie Benson?" a voice said slowly.

"It's Nora," Freddie mouthed to everyone. "Yes, is that Nora? You got out of prison? That's good to hear."

"Yes, I was lucky my Mistress showed up to get me out."

"Uh … 'mistress'?"

"My Mistress Tsukuyomi," Nora answered him. "She was kind enough to come to me with a little gift."

Sam was about to yell in the phone, but Negi put his hand up to stop her, prepared to cover her mouth if the situation called for it.

"By 'gift', you mean Carly, right?" Freddie asked cautiously.

"Maaaaaaybe," Nora droned in her usual way.

"Listen, Nora," he said into the phone. "We're on our way to meet you, as requested in the note left in the studio."

"I'm glad to hear that, Freddie," Nora said, sounding happy. "You see, Mistress Tsukuyomi promised me if you all came here with what she asked for, then all of you will be mine for as long as I like. You hear that? We'll be together forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever and–"

Sam couldn't take it anymore, and reached over and grabbed the phone. "All right, listen up, Dershlit. When we get there, we'll see if you can handle us, because unless you've forgotten, we beat you the last two times, and we'll do it again!"

"We'll see about that, Samantha," Nora said in a low voice. "You have one hour. Be here by then or else."

"OR ELSE WH–" Sam started to say when Freddie grabbed his phone back.

"We'll be there, Nora," he seethed, barely in control. "Just keep Carly safe until we get there." He hung up and hung his head. "This is not good. Why did you interfere, Sam? She was in a good mood, but you ruined it!"

"I couldn't take anymore of her crazy talk."

"Not only did that girl kidnap Carly, but she used her to barter a deal with Nora. Now, Nora has her freedom and she's about to get all of us on a silver platter," Spencer shook his head sullenly. "And now that I think about it, we left our weapons on the train, and that explosion must have destroyed them. Can this get any worse?"

"Don't say that, or we'll be attacked again," Sam slapped his back. "Besides, I've still got this." She pulled the butter sock out of her pocket.

"Just don't swing that thing in here! Either way, we have to get moving again," Tori said, hitting the intercom button again. "Sebastian, let's get going. We're on a timer!"

"Hang on, kids," came the reply as the limousine started up again with a roar.

"All right," Negi said curtly as they started moving. "There's a few more things that need to be addressed, but I'm afraid I don't have time to explain it myself." He stood up. "Chamo, can you stay behind and brief them?"

The white ermine poked his head of Negi's breast pocket and saluted him. "Sure thing, Negi. Leave it to me!"

"WHOA! Did that mouse just talk?!" Tori was shocked, but Negi didn't stop to answer her. Instead, the rodent jumped out of his pocket and landed on her shoulder.

"Listen, Toots. I'm an ermine, not a mouse, and Negi here has left it to me to give you the lowdown on what's about to go down. So you'd better listen up, because I don't like repeating myself."

"Sorry, what was that last part again?" she asked, leaning her head a little bit more.

"I said, I don't like repeating my – HEY!" Chamo steamed, causing everyone to start laughing.

"Now, if you'll excuse us. Setsuna?" Negi looked at his student, who nodded and drew her sword, but before she could cut a hole in the roof, Tori held out her hand.

"Hold it, I know what you're thinking, but please, just do this," she pressed a button to opened the sunroof. "This limo isn't mine – some friends lent it to me."

Setsuna bowed in apology. "I understand; I apologize." And without hesitation, she leaped through the opening into the night air.

"What is she doing?! Are she crazy?!" Tori looked through the hole just in time to see Setsuna sprout a pair of enormous wings and soar on ahead of them.

Negi paused, and looked at her. Don't worry. In this endeavor, we shall be victorious."

Having said his part, he immediately turned and followed his student's lead. As soon as he was clear of the window, he enshrouded himself in bright white-blue lightning energy and was gone in a flash. "What the?!" She looked back to see Sam, Freddy and Spencer looking out the windows at them, or rather, their trails.

"You know, I don't care how many times I see it – that is _awesome!_" Spencer shook his head in awe.

"All right," Tori sat down and told them. "You guys are going to tell me everything, and you're going to tell me now, because if I've been dragged into this, I need to know what I'm dealing with here!"

The iCarly gang just looked at Chamo, as if inviting him to speak. He nodded right away. "All right, Honey. You want an explanation? You've got one. Just don't end up regretting it when I'm through."

* * *

As they flew, Negi drew out his cell phone and keyed in 9…1…1.

Slowing his speed and undoing his aura, he put the phone to his ear. "Yes, please give me the Washington State Patrol. This is an emergency, so please hurry."

"What are you doing, Professor?" Setsuna called over the howl of the wind in their ears. "Getting the general public involved could make this even worse."

"Quite the contrary, Setsuna," Negi told her. "If the general public isn't aware of the situation, there will more than just property damage. Hello? Police? I need to talk to your commanding officer immediately. This is urgent." After a few seconds, another person picked up. "Hello? Lieutenant? My name is Negi Springfield. I'm a member of the NGO group Austro-Africus Aeternalis. I need you to listen very carefully. I'm sure you're aware that Nora Dershlit and her mother have broken out of prison. There is a dangerous hostage situation developing in the Dershlit household … No, no! Don't go in there! My associates and I will handle things. What I need from you is to have all the houses within a one-mile radius of the Dershlit house evacuated, immediately. Set up a barricade around the perimeter and we'll take it from there. Don't go there personally – if the kidnappers catch sight of even one police car, they'll execute the hostage. I promise once everything is settled, we'll hand the perpetrators over to you … The hostage is Carly Shay … Yes, from iCarly … I understand. We'll meet you when we get there. Please wait for us at the North by Northeast end of the barricade." Then he whispered something into the phone in such a low voice that Setsuna couldn't hear it over the howl of the wind.

"Well?" Setsuna pulled to a halt, her wings spread wide.

"They said they'll cooperate for now, but we must be careful. If there's too much damage, we may be looking at some serious legal trouble, and I can't afford a lawyer on my salary. Not to mention my students would have to go through another teacher's arrest."

Setsuna smiled. Even in this situation, Negi was still thinking of his students – he hadn't changed a bit, even after learning of his origins as the lost Prince of the Magical World, and of his life's mission. "Don't forget about what Asuna would do to you."

"I've been trying not to think about that," he smiled back. He reached into his bottom pocket and pulled out a folded map. Unfolding it, he checked their position relative to their destination. "Look's like we've come a good 40 miles from our starting point, and making good time. Let's stay in the air another 20 miles, then we'll meet the police at the rendezvous point and wait for the others to arrive."

With a nod from Setsuna, they flew off into the night sky as a brilliant full moon shone overhead.

* * *

**Please Read & Review!  
**

I received a review once asking me to add Victorious to the mix – as you can see, I've decided to grant that reader's wish. However, I have plans to one-up it in the future. You'll have to wait and see how, of course!


	10. Spell 8: Let the Show Begin!

I should have known I hadn't lost my touch! I just haven't been writing enough, due to my job search and all that's going on with that. After months and months of thinking, planning and brainstorming, the eighth installment of _iLove Magic_ is ready to go.

**IMPORTANT: In recent months, I updated some previous chapters, correcting for assorted errors, adding new details, and in the case of Spell 4, new jokes. It's your choice, of course, I recommend re-reading some previous chapters so that you don't get confused while reading this one.**

I hope you all find it to your liking, my friends!

* * *

Let the Show Begin!

As Negi and Setsuna touched down on the ground, it had already been 10 minutes since Nora had given them their 60-minute time limit. Negi pulled a pocket watch out of his breast pocket and clicked it open. "We're making pretty good time," he said as he slipped it back into his pocket. "If my calculations are right, we're not far from the boundary I asked the police department to set up. We should hurry – I need to talk to the Lieutenant before our friends get here." So with that, they started walking down the road.

As they walked, Setsuna looked at her favorite teacher. "Professor, you never told me how you intend to get the girl away from Tsukuyomi in the middle of a human-filled area."

"That's why I called the police and had them evacuate the houses. I have a plan to get the hostage out of their clutches, but if Tsukuyomi jumps in, Setsuna, I'm counting on you to keep her off our backs until I can get Carly to safety. After that, I'll come help you deal with her. With any luck, Tsukuyomi hasn't told Nora about me yet. If so, it gives us the advantage."

"Shall we give her a permanent detention?" she smiled.

"Hey, that's my line," Negi smiled back. A moment later, they started to see lights up ahead. "Ah, there it is," he broke into a run with Setsuna on his heels.

* * *

"All right! The area is now secure. Don't let anything in or out under any circumstance without my permission!" Lieutenant Rubizowski of the Washington State Patrol had just gotten through giving her orders to the officers patrolling the blockade when she saw a pair of young people approaching. As they grew closer, the lights along the perimeter illuminated them, revealing a young boy wearing a suit and what looked like a cape and a Japanese girl in her mid-teen years. "Hold it, you two! This road has been sealed off, you'll have to go arou-"

"Lieutenant Rubizowski, I presume?" the boy interrupted her. "I'm Negi Springfield. I believe we spoke on the phone a little while ago?"

"Hmm? That voice … so _you're_ Mr. Springfield? I don't believe you. What's the password?" Negi blushed.

"Do I have to?"

"If you intend to enter this barricade, you'll have to prove you're the one who ordered it," she said with absolute authority. "If you want, you can whisper it in my ear," she smiled.

He sighed heavily and walked up to her as she bent down and whispered, "All Japanese girls _don't_ have tiny bosoms." Setsuna almost giggled. _He's got a point; half the girls in our class are bigger than some adults_. Unconsciously, she put a hand to her own bosom, which was still in development. _I have to admit, sometimes I feel a little jealous of them_.

"Well, that settles that," she straightened up, satisfied. "From this point, it's a straight shot that way to the Dershlit household," she pointed directly behind her. "I'll let you pass, as long as you keep your end of the bargain."

"Of course," Negi smiled. "The perpetrators will be handed over to you, unharmed. That's what I'd like to say, at least, but with Ms. Puckett's anti-authority attitude, I'm not sure I'll be able to deliver them in _perfect_ health.

"Also, I must ask one other thing," he continued. "The person who attacked the prison and released the prisoners is no ordinary girl, so I ask that you allow me to take her into custody myself. With all due respect, I do not believe you can handle her."

"I suppose I have no choice," she sighed. "Anyone who can destroy a reinforced concrete wall like that can't be considered 'normal,' so you can do with her as you see fit. Now tell me, is it just you two going in there? I hope you don't fault me for saying, but you … don't exactly look up to the task of dealing with a mentally unstable family like the Dershlits." Negi chuckled.

"Well, it's not the first time I've been underestimated, and I'm sure it won't be the last, either," he scratched the back of his head. "But then again, if the Dershlits _do_ underestimate me, then all the more power to us." Then he heard a familiar sound coming up behind him. "Ah, that'll be the rest of our team now," he turned to see the limousine screech to a halt. As the nearby officers reached for their weapons, Negi held up a hand, "_STAND DOWN!_ They're with me!" he called out quite impressively with authority that the Lieutenant secretly had to admire. _How's a child like that learn to speak with such … presence?_

The car door immediately opened and their friends quickly dashed out and approached them. "What's going on here?" Spencer asked Negi. "The news didn't say anything about roadblocks in the area."

"That's because I'm in charge here," the Lieutenant stepped forward. "It's meant to keep any innocent civilians as far away from the Dershlits as possible, especially the press. I'm Lieutenant Amy Rubizowski. When I learned the hostage was part of _iCarly_, I guessed I'd be seeing you guys. Nice to meet you, my daughters are huge fans, by the way."

"Thanks, 'ppreciate it," Spencer offered her his hand.

"I hope you realize what you're getting into?" she asked as she shook his hand firmly.

"Aah," Spencer said as she let go. "Nice grip."

"Unfortunately, we know full well what we're getting into," Freddie nodded solemnly. "But it can't be avoided," he clenched his fists.

"If Carly's in that house, we're not leaving without her," Sam declared, taking the butter sock out of her pocket.

"That, we're not," Negi checked his watch. "Only 30 minutes left. You sure took your time getting here. We're going to have to hurry. Are you prepared?"

"Stop asking us that and let's get over there!" both Sam and Freddie yelled in frustration.

Negi took his fingers out of his ears. "Right then. Well Lieutenant, thank you for your help. We'll take it from here," he saluted her and as she returned his, he nodded and ushered his friends past the barricades. "We _will_ be back."

* * *

As Tori watched her friends walk away, helplessness couldn't help but snake its way into her mind. "There's no way I'm letting them go into this on their own. I can help, too." She got back in the car and hit the intercom. "Sebastian, there's somewhere I need to go. My friends need help, so it's time to call in the cavalry!" She then proceeded to whip out her cell phone and start dialing.

"Then hang on tight, Miss!" came the reply and the big car roared into life.

* * *

When they had finally put the police barricade behind them, Spencer turned to Negi. "Well, we're almost there, but do we have a plan to get into that house? Nora could have any kind of traps set up for us." Negi looked back at him.

"Well, I have a few plans in mind, but given the circumstances, there is something I'm curious about." He turned to all three of his friends, walking backwards down the road. "About how long has it been since you first met Nora?"

"Hmm," Freddie put his hand to his chin in thought. "About one year if I've got my dates right."

"Then you know what that means, right?" Spencer leaned in close, speaking out the side of his mouth.

"Unfortunately, I do," Freddie nodded.

"If you know, then why don't you tell us Mr. Brainiac?" Sam pushed in between them.

"Don't you get it, Sam?" Freddie slapped himself in the forehead. "That means that it's right around Nora's birthday!"

"Oh no," Sam put her face in her hand, almost causing her to trip when they got to the curb. "We're in for it now. I just know she's gonna make us stay for another party that goes on 'forever and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever' just like last time."

"Maybe not," Negi thought out loud. He turned back around, holding up his hand to signal a halt. "I had a couple of other plans, but if it's her birthday time, then I've got a better idea. Perhaps if she's planning to catch you guys off guard, then perhaps we should do the exact same thing to her. Given the circumstances, this should go without a hitch." He bit his finger again. "All right then," he smiled as he set to work, drawing a large circle on the sidewalk in his own blood.

"Ick," Freddie cringed. "Do you have to do that?"

"Yeah, Neg," came Chamo's voice from the nearby grass as he hopped onto Negi's bouncing shoulder. "All ya needed to do was ask me!"

"It's true, but that chalk of yours is too conspicuous." _About time you got here. It's because you're late that I had to resort to this!_

"AND THIS ISN'T?!" Freddie nearly screamed.

"Shh," Negi shushed him. "Don't want to make scene, do we?"

"Yeah, shut up, Fredward. This is cool!" Sam pushed in front of him.

"Girl, you got gross tastes," Spencer commented.

"It's true you have a point, Chamo, but since there's no one else around, it doesn't really matter. Besides, once it's used, the circle will disappear. Anyway, this'll serve just as well." He put the finishing touches on it. _Just in time. The bleeding has already stopped._ "It's ready. All right, everyone. You all wait here, and when Chamo gives you the signal, get in the circle and join hands. The circle will take care of the rest. Chamo, I'll contact you via telepathy when the time is right. Setsuna, you're with me."

"Right," his student nodded, slinging her sword sleeve over her shoulder.

"But Negi, you still haven't told us what you're going to do!" Freddie protested.

"Simple," he winked at them before turning around, his cloak swirling around him. "I'm going to give Ms. Dershlit a little birthday surprise before we get down to business. So without further ado, let the show begin!"

* * *

Well, that's all I've got for now ... NOT! I wrote an extra page a few days ago, but I decided it looked better as the opening scene of the next chapter instead of the closing scene of this one, so I've already got some momentum going.

Even though assuming things makes an a** out of me, I'm going to assume you all can guess what Negi is going to do for Nora in the next installment, which brings me to this: I'm once again giving you the chance to influence the flow of the next chapter. **Review or PM me with ideas for next time. I've already got some, but I want to make this more interactive. I could make a poll, but I'd rather wait and see what you guys and gals come up with.**

This inherently means it will take longer, but I want to give my readers what _they_ want, not just what _I_ want.


	11. Spell 9: The Show's Over!

Hello all! By now I've lost all track of how long it's been since I last did anything for any of my fics, but after a long and grueling marathon of Writer's Block, I've come back with something I can be proud of, just in time for the New Year.

I AM rather disappointed that I never got a suggestion from any of you fine people for something for Negi to do in this chapter. Did I not make the hints in the last chapter clear enough? Well, regardless of such, it took me a long time and a lot of mulling things over to come up with this performance of an update.

I also got my first smart phone recently, and a couple of the games I got into early on turned me into a bit of an addict, but I've deleted both, started with one that's a little less addicting, and I'm on the road to recovery.

I hope you enjoy it, and will forgive me for my very long absence.

**Updated and edited for errors and additional details: 1/19/2014**

* * *

The Show's Over!

"But Professor …" Setsuna complained again. "Must I really wear this?" Negi had clad her in a rather sexy looking outfit to assist in his "magic show." It featured fish-net stockings, white high heels, and a sleeveless tuxedo-pattern top with a solid black bottom that left her belly button exposed, and she was now wearing her hair down. "It's so ... revealing! I feel so dirty …"

"Well, the cat-eared maid costume stored in your pactio card doesn't really suit the part," Negi smiled at her, a trickle of blood running from his nose where she had slapped him only seconds earlier. "And besides, the beautiful assistant should look the part, and you _do_ look stunning. Besides, would you rather wear that sleazy underwear from the Mahora Budokai?"

"Who told you about that?!" she cried, slapping him again. "That's … not the point," Setsuna blushed deeply, trying to cover herself. _A Shinmei student dressed like some exhibitionist. If any of my classmates were to see this … If _Konoka_ were to see this … I would die of embarrassment!_ "I'd rather wear a nice black suit like you," she complained, indicating the black suit Negi was now wearing, having used magic to alter the fabric of his suit to look more like a showman. "At least give me back my bike shorts!"

"Now, now," he said gently, draping his cloak over her shoulders as he started leading her towards the Dershlits' front porch. "It'll just be for a little while, I promise. Once I give the signal, you're free to change clothes with your pactio card."

"But what about exposing magic to the mundanes?" she pulled the cloak around her body. "Aren't we supposed to be avoiding that?"

"I think we're past the point of no return as it is," he sighed. "The best thing we can hope to do here is some damage control. If they think what I'm doing is parlor tricks, then that's probably best. Remember, this family is supposed to be a little bit … as our friends would say, 'super-duper-freaky-deaky-crazy-in-the-head.' If we can keep their minds focused on us and not the others, we can take them by surprise and win this thing. I think we're in luck … I don't sense Tsukuyomi around right now."

"But why wouldn't she be here?" Setsuna put her right hand to her chin in thought.

"Fate must be giving her a hard time somewhere," Negi surmised after a moment. "He must be pretty upset with her using his minitras in her scheme, though he doesn't show it."

"Yeah, that boy never shows his emotions, even when he laughs," she smiled, remembering the last time she saw the young albino boy laugh. "Anyway, time is running out. We've got to get in that house."

"You're right," Negi check his watch again, flipping a red candy drop into his mouth and biting down. "20 minutes left. Should be enough for what I've got planned. The preparations are complete, so let's go!" From within the puff of smoke, he whirled his staff off his back and flipped it into the air, guiding it with his mind until it hovered outside a closed and boarded-up window. As the smoke cleared, with a look of absolute confidence on his face, Negi strode up to the front door and rang the doorbell.

* * *

"Tick-tock, tick-tock," Nora repeated to herself quietly as she paced back and forth in her basement, not taking her eyes off Carly. "Just 20 more minutes until midnight. In just a short time, Carly, you and your friends will belong to me … forever and ever and ever and –"

"You'll never get away with this, Nora!" Carly yelled defiantly. "I swear I'll see you rot in prison forever and ever and ever!"

"Oh, I'm never going back there, Carly. NEVER!" her captor screamed in a voice that sent shivers down Carly's spine. "My mistress promised me that if I do as she says, I'll never have to worry about prison for the rest of my life."

"You realize that could mean anything, Nora," Carly sensed an opening. "What if she's planning to just kill all of us when she gets what she wants?"

Nora stopped pacing and looked up. "What are you saying?"

"Think about it for a second, Nora!" Carly struggled to stay calm and level-headed. "What has that crazy, violent girl got to gain from keeping you alive? You're only a tool for her. A pawn. Once she has whatever she wants, what use for you will she have?"

Seeing a smidgen of doubt appear in her captor's eyes, Carly decided instantly to push further. "What do you say, Nora? Get me out of here and I'll help you. I'll get your sentence reduced, I'll get you out of the country. Just let me down and you'll never hear from me or my family and friends again."

"And let you leave my life forever?" Nora echoed in a low voice. "NEVER!" she shrieked again. "That's the last thing I want," she licked her lips. "Worry not, Carly. I won't let anything happen to –"

_DING-DONG_

"Oh!" Nora nearly jumped. "I think there's someone at the door," she looked at Carly with a mixed look of elation and mocking in her eye as she raced up the stairs. "I wonder who it could be?" she practically screamed.

"Ooooh noooo," was all Carly could say as she heard what felt like her only remaining hope run across the upstairs room to what must have been the front door.

* * *

As Negi heard activity on the other side of the door, he signaled for Setsuna to prepare herself. _Sounds like locks clicking. This one is cautious._ "Showtime," he whispered as a little window in the door opened and he saw Nora's dirty and disheveled face for the first time.

"Who are you?" Nora asked him barely above a whisper. "I WANTED SAM AND FREDDIE!"

"Good evening, ma'am. Nora Dershlit, I presume?" he asked with a polite smile.

"Yes," she said after a moment. "Who wants to know?"

"Well, my name is Negi, and I'll tell you exactly why I'm here. You see, Nora, Sam, Freddie, and Spencer are on their way, but ran into a bit of a snag when their train … blew up. They will be here soon, but to make sure you don't get lonely, they asked me to come and perform for you until they arrive."

_Blew up? What is that girl thinking? What about our deal?! Maybe Carly _was_ right …_ "Perform?" Nora echoed his words. "What are you, a dancer?"

"Better," he grinned, extending a hand toward her, a thornless rose appearing in his hand. "I'm a magician, the thing that every birthday party needs, but _you've_ never had at yours. Am I correct?"

Nora gasped. "How did you know that?!" she demanded.

"Because I'm magic," he bowed grandiosely, "and if you'll allow me, I'll give you a birthday show you'll never forget!"

"Hmm," she paused to think. "Okay, come in," and as she opened the door, she glared at him. "But I'll have my eyes on you!"

"Certainly, my dear," he said smoothly as he placed the rose in her hair. "Oh," he said, looking around the room. Most of the furniture around the living room was either in disrepair and pushed off to the side or covered in dirt and cobwebs. "Are you alone in the house tonight?"

Nora's eyes shifted slightly, but Negi pretended not to notice. "Yes, she had to go and … pick up my dad."

_From prison, no doubt_, Negi thought. "Well, more magic for you then," he took off his cloak and tossed it into the air. Like someone else was wearing it, it glided once around the living room and landed neatly on the coat rack hung on the wall to his left. As Nora looked on in amazement, not missing a beat, Negi crossed to the dining room table and expertly removed the tablecloth without jarring the old, dirty glass candlesticks sitting atop it. "Because whenever Negi performs," he draped it over Nora's head, and after taking a vial of ink from his jacket and drawing a circle around her feet, he whipped it off her to reveal a shiny pink party dress, "someone smiles!" Seeing Nora's shocked and delighted expression satisfied him. _This means I'm doing it right, and with any luck, she'll forget about the time limit. I figure, the least we can do is give her a good time before we send her and her family back to prison._

"Now we won't be able to do much with all of this furniture taking up so much space in this room." With a wave of his arms, as if invisible hands had pushed it, the dusty and dilapidated chairs moved to the right side of the living room to rest against the wall.

"How did you do that?" Nora said, as if short of breath, looking herself over.

"Ah, I could tell you, but a good magician never reveals his secrets, my fine young lady," he smiled as he snapped his fingers. Instantly, the entire house went black.

"Hey! Who turned out the lights? What was that for?" Nora almost shrieked, but Negi didn't listen.

After a few moments, he called out, "NOW LET THERE BE LIGHT!" and snapped his fingers again. Immediately, the house was lit again, this time, more dimly. As Nora looked around, she saw that candles were floating throughout the house, lighting every nook and cranny of the dusty and dirty Dershlit home. "Well, it's clear this house hasn't been cleaned in a while. Let's fix that, shall we?" He wriggled his fingers. "Now blow, gust of wind!" _Flet une vente. Flans saltatio pulverea._ As if an invisible gust of wind had swept through the house, all of the dirt and grime that had built up in the Dershlits' absence was blown through the air and out the windows. The house wasn't sparkling clean, but it was a significant improvement. "Not bad, eh?" Negi scratched his nose. "That was my first time doing that trick. I'm glad it worked."

"What if it didn't work?" Nora dared ask.

"The whole house would have been wrecked," he winked at her.

Nora didn't know whether to be grateful or suspicious of this strange man.

* * *

As she listened to everything from outside, Setsuna shook her head. _How does he do it? Somehow, Professor Negi never fails to amaze … or disappoint, depending on who's with him or against him._ As she thought this, a light breeze blew through the neighborhood. "Brr," she shivered. _When is he going to bring me into this? I want to just get this over with and put some damn clothes on!_

* * *

"What's going on up there?" Carly thought out loud from where she hung. "I wanna know! What the heck is he doing, some kinda magic show?" _He's supposed to be saving me!_ she thought, struggling against the ropes binding her.

* * *

"That's ten minutes he's been gone," Spencer checked his watch. "Time is running out."

"I say we just bust in there, butter sock swinging!" Sam said for the second time, still brandishing the old sock, swinging it around her body as if preparing to hit an imaginary Nora.

"No, Sam," Freddie told her for the second time, pacing back and forth. "We should trust Negi. I think he's our best bet. Say you bust in there, swinging your sock, and Negi's plan is ruined, resulting in Carly being hurt. What'll you do then? This isn't about you having your fun!" He turned to look at her, only to get struck by the flying sock right in his solar plexus.

"Oops, my hand slipped," she said very insincerely. _THAT was fun._

"You're … a really bad liar," he said, gasping for breath.

"HEY! STOP MESSING AROUND!" Chamo jumped up and slapped her cheek with his small furry hand. "You can't afford to hurt your own friends. Negi's signal could come at any time. You have to be ready! Now stop wasting your energy, all of you. Just sit down and shut up until I tell you to act, all right?!" he was nodding his head with his eyes closed, as if talking down to a naïve child, but Sam grabbed him around his middle.

"You're not giving the orders here, rat," she threw him ten feet across the sidewalk.

As he flew head-over-tiny-heels, Chamo's eyes opened wide. Flipping over three times, he landed lightly on his feet. "That's the signal! Everyone get inside the circle, join hands, and squeeze in tightly. Trust me and do as I say!"

"All right, come on you guys," Spencer stepped inside the circle. When he saw their hesitation, he held out his hands. "Come on, do you guys wanna save Carly or not?"

Freddie stepped forward, still massaging his gut. "I'm in," he said decisively, taking Spencer's hand and hesitantly extended his hand to Sam. "Come on, Sam. Carly's your best friend. Are you gonna give up on her?"

Sam immediately stepped forward and grabbed their hands, both men cringing slightly from her angry grip. "If you ever say that again, I'll rip your head off, Benson."

"Welcome back, Sam," Freddie smiled. _Hope Sam washed her hands today_, he thought, already knowing he was probably wrong. And with bated breath, the three friends squeezed into the confines of the circle as tightly as they could and waited.

* * *

"Well, well," Negi said, taking out his pocket watch. "It seems I'm almost out of time. Sam, Freddie and Spencer will be here any minute. However, but before I bid you adieu, I will show you one final trick, an act so special, you'll never forget it for as long as you live!"

"Yay!" Nora applauded, now quite mellowed out from the series of incredible feats she had seen.

"First, though," he clapped his hands together. "I'm going to need some good wood." He crossed to the window and looked out. "That fence ought to do the trick." He stretched out his hands and in seconds, board after board of a white picket fence soared through the window and came together to form a large box in the center of the room, big enough to hold several people. "Here you see a normal box, just assembled right before your eyes. No trapdoors, no windows," he opened the door so she could clearly see inside, and as he turned his back to close it, he put a finger to his forehead. _Setsuna, come in now._

"And now," he said at last, "with the help of my lovely assistant …" he gestured toward to door and in walked Setsuna, clad in the sexy magician's assistant's outfit he had given her, smiling as genuinely as she could, "our grand finale!" As Nora's eyes diverted to gaze upon Setsuna, Negi quickly turned and with his own blood, drew another hexagram inside the box, identical to the one he had drawn outside, and closed the box before Nora looked back. "If you would kindly step inside my dear?" he held the door open for his student and she walked inside. "Don't worry. It'll be over in a few seconds," he whispered in her ear as she passed. "After that, feel free to change clothes."

When she was safely inside, he closed the door behind her. "And now, at the count of three, I will open the box, and my lovely assistant will have vanished, leaving something very special in her place!"

"Ooh, what is it?!" Nora squealed. "Is it a big birthday cake?"

"You'll see," Negi grinned. _Please work!_ He took a deep breath. "Right then!" he held out his arms on a downward slant, aimed at the base of the box. "ONE … TWO … THREE!" A bright light began to glow from inside the box, and with a loud POOF and a puff of colored smoke, the light disappeared. "Are you ready for your big surprise?" he asked her with a big smile.

"Yes, YES!" Nora could barely contain her excitement. "Let me have it!"

"Okay, then. One … two … three!" and he pulled the door open wide and Sam, Freddie, and Spencer stepped out to stand at Negi's side, each holding some sort of object and looking none-too-happy to see her.

"WHAT THE HECK!" Nora cried out in shock. "What is this?"

"I'm sorry, but," Negi said with closed eyes and a solemn look on his face holding out his hand. His staff broke through the window and spun neatly into his outstretched palm. "The show's over."

"GET HER!" Sam shouted and all three charged at Nora.

* * *

Translation:

_Flet une vente. Flans saltatio pulverea - _Blow, gust of wind. Blow forth, Dancing Dust (The Dance of Wind-Blown Dirt spell)

* * *

I hope you've all enjoyed my most recent work. I may have made it a little bit more ... theatrical than I needed to, but I wanted to do something nice and entertaining for my first update in months.

I would appreciate any comments or words of encouragement. Going for my Master's at NYU and looking for a job keep me very busy. Your reviews and comments are what keep me going more than anything else!

I wish you all a happy holiday season, and a Happy New Year!


	12. Spell 10: Meet the Dershlits!

I had so much fun writing the last chapter that it carried me right over into this one, so I kept the momentum going. I also edited and updated the last chapter for assorted errors and added some additional details for the sake of creating a slightly more clear picture. I decided to add a flashback to this chapter, in order to add some additional details without awkwardly changing past chapters. It's my first time doing it, so I chose to go with the screenplay-type approach. I just hope it doesn't confuse anyone.

I hope you all enjoy it!

* * *

Meet the Dershlits!

"GET HER!"

At Sam's scream, Freddie and Spencer charged Nora, and before the psychotic teen could reach for a weapon to defend herself, grabbed her arms and wrenched them behind her back.

"Wow, I can't believe that worked," Freddie struggled to keep Nora's left arm in place. All those months in prison had done wonders for her physique, unfortunately for them. "All right, Sam. HAVE AT HER!"

"With pleasure!" Sam whirled the butter sock over her head, swinging it several times to gain as much momentum as she could, but before she could take her first swing at the trapped Nora, Spencer held out an arm.

"Wait a minute, Sam!" he yelled, struggling to keep Nora's right arm pinned down with only one hand.

"What do you mean 'wait a minute'?" Sam stopped swinging the sock and let her arm fall limp. "I was about to whack the teeth out of this weirdo!"

"I've told you a hundred times … I'M JUST DISTURBED!" Nora shrieked.

"Shut up!" Freddie snapped, cranking her arm back further, quite satisfied at the hiss of pain that escaped Nora's clenched teeth. "You're a _psychopath_ and you _know_ it!"

"ANYWAY!" Spencer interrupted. "Not yet, Sam. _First_, we need to find out where Carly is. _Then_ you can start swinging!"

"Oh yeah, good point," Sam admitted. "Can't get answers from a dead girl after all!"

Nora gulped at this. "Don't worry," Spencer said. "We won't _really_ kill you."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "_Half-kill_ will be just fine. Then the cops can have what's left! Because of you and that crazy sword chick, people have gotten seriously hurt or killed. Life in prison should be the least of your worries, because if we had our way, you'd be headed to the gallows!"

"Quiet, Fredward," Sam stepped forward in two strides and grabbed Nora by the neck of her dress. "Now you tell us where Carly is or I'll turn your face into pulp," she whispered, her voice reeking of barely restrained rage.

"Never!" Nora spat in Sam's face.

"That's it!" Wiping the saliva off her face with her left wrist, Sam wound up her sock-hand and swung hard, but Nora tilted her head to the right and Freddie took the blow to his left cheek instead of Nora.

"Gah, watch it with that thing!" he flinched, trying to keep his grip on Nora, but to no avail. Nora threw him off of her, sending him sprawling to the floor. With her free hand, Nora then proceeded to twist Spencer's nose until his grip loosened. A moment later, he was lying on top of Freddie.

"HAH! I'm free!" Nora said with glee as she grabbed a large, jagged piece of glass from the floor and held it to Freddie's neck. The glass was cutting her own hand in the process, but she seemed long past the point of caring. "Now drop the sock, Sam. Or else!"

"I won't allow that."

Everyone looked to see Negi standing behind Nora. "You didn't forget about me, did you?"

Nora tried to turn to face him, but before she could, Negi stretched out his left hand and said, "_Flans exarmatio."_ The glass shard flew from Nora's hand, narrowly missing Sam's face, and she was blown off of Freddie by a strong gust of wind, landing heavily halfway across the living room, just short of the dining room table.

"How did you do that?!" Nora hissed, rising to her feet, her hair now looking quite tousled. But Negi was already behind her again, kneeling down on the tabletop.

He held his left hand to her back again. "_Aer capturae."_

As Sam, Freddie, and Spencer looked on in amazement, multiple ribbons of pale green energy sprouted from the floor and bound Nora's entire body. Once she was restrained, Negi walked around to her front and looked her square in the eye. "And one other thing: _don't mess with my friends!"_ The voice in which he made this statement was not his own; it sounded dark and warped, like that of a beast that had learned to speak English.

"WHAT ARE YOU?!" she screamed in his face, snarling like a rabid dog.

"I'm simply …" he held one hand in front of his face, and swiping it to the side, undid his transformation, emerging from the puff of smoke in his more youthful form, "… one _heck_ of a magician." _Yes, I nailed it!_ Feeling quite pleased with himself and his performance, he stepped back to join his friends.

* * *

Setsuna touched down lightly on the spot where Sam, Freddie, and Spencer had been only moments before, relieved to be finished with her first, and hopefully only, experience as a magician's assistant. "Good, it worked. Now to get rid of this horrid outfit and get back to the –"

"HOTCHA!" Chamo cried as he leaped towards the sexily clothed teen. "Nobody pinch me, I think I'm in Heaven." However, Setsuna sensed him coming and caught him in between her thumb and forefinger in a very tight pinch. "Gaaah! She did it anyway! Animal abuse!"

"Asuna told me to do that if you got fresh, and it looks like she had the right idea," Setsuna put him down on the grass. "Now if your perversion is over, I need to get back to Professor Negi and help him before Tsukuyomi arrives."

"'Salright. 'Salright, girly! I don't smell anyone around except the cops back there! Big Brother Negi is in the –" then his nose twitched midsentence. "Wah! Scratch that! There's someone closing in on them. A bunch of someones!"

"What?!" Setsuna gasped. "But what about the barrier?"

"Maybe they were already within the confines of the barrier when Negi created it. Blast it!" he waved his arms up and down in panic.

**Flashback**

Negi: (whispering) Listen, Setsuna, Chamo. After I told the _iCarly_ crowd to stay behind, I used a barrier-forming technique I've been experimenting with to create a special barrier with a half-mile radius around the Dershlits' house. It's designed to let people _out_, but not _in_.

Setsuna: (confused) But why? Wouldn't it be better to keep them in and stop them from escaping?

Negi: Setsuna, you know as well as I do that if Tsukuyomi comes into this and she ends up trapped in the barrier with us, everyone in the area could die. (winks)

**End flashback**

"Or perhaps … Tsukuyomi has already broken the barrier! It's certainly within her power to do so." Setsuna whipped out her pactio card. _But if _that's_ the case, it means she may be watching us as we speak._

"Either way, we both know what that means!" Chamo surmised, leaping on her shoulder.

"Our friends are in danger!" Setsuna spoke both their minds. "_Adeat!_" In a swirl of smoke and feathers, Setsuna emerged wearing a maid costume with a pair of cat ears on her head, as well as two-toed socks and platform sandals, and sprouted from her back were two brilliant white angel wings. _Yes, that's much better. I'm never wearing high heels again!_ "Hang on, ermine. We've gotta fly!" And with that, she took off, soaring into the night sky.

"WAAH!" Chamo screamed, hanging onto her uniform for dear life. "AT LEAST WAIT UNTIL I'M READY!"

* * *

"Wow, that was epic! You p'owned her like it was nothing!" Freddie clapped Negi on the shoulder. "So this is what magic can do?"

"No," he shook his head. "It's only the tip of the iceberg." This proclamation made Spencer's legs almost go limp.

"I'll admit it," Sam ruffled his hair. "You did good, kid."

"You lied to me!" Nora cried, thrashing in desperation. "You made me think you really wanted to give me a good birthday party."

"But that's what a magician's job is," Freddie feigned sympathy, "to deceive his audience. Now tell us where Carly is!" he demanded, completely serious now.

"That's okay, Freddie," Negi stepped forward again. "It's clear neither the easy way nor the hard way is going to get us anywhere. Now, we're going to do it _my_ way." He fiercely looked Nora in the eye, and for only a second, their eyes remained locked. After which, Nora's head immediately sagged, as if she'd passed out standing up.

"Carly is tied up downstairs," Negi said, turning around. "Spencer, you should go and cut her down and get her out of here before company arrives."

"Wait, how did you find that out?" Freddie turned Negi around to look at him. "You just looked at her and she passed out!"

"I cast a spell on her that basically put the two of us in an illusory space where I was able to interrogate her. It's designed to last for only a matter of seconds, while in the aforementioned space, time flows more slowly, so I was able to accomplish more in less time. To tell you the truth, it was my first time inducing the spell on another. I'm glad it worked. Still, my skill with this particular spell isn't as polished as my Master's, so I suppose the shock upon returning to reality was too much for her."

"So you're saying you interrogated her in some fake dream you made her have, and we didn't even get to see it?!" Sam grabbed him.

"Well, without Nodoka here, there was no way to show you what occurred," he smiled coaxingly. _Luckily for them_. "And there was nothing fake about it," now he was more serious. "What she experienced in the duration of that illusion was very real, and it was likely quite taxing on her mind. I don't think we'll have to worry about her for some time." He turned to Spencer. "Now hurry and save your sister!"

"Why is there such urgency in your voice?" Spencer asked very anxiously, as if he already knew the answer.

"While I know not whom, someone has slipped through my barrier, and they are coming this way as we speak. We will not be alone for long. Now, GO!" he commanded.

Not wanting to be yelled at again, Spencer dashed to the basement door and wrenched it open so hard it came off its hinges completely. "Carly!" they heard him call as he noisily through the door aside and charged down the steps.

"Okay, now we need to prepare for some hostile interference," Negi said, looking toward the door.

"What do you mean?" Freddie looked at him. "You're not saying…?"

"While I was interrogating Nora, she said that her mother was bringing the family to the party they were going to throw. While I'm not convinced that's _all_ we will have to deal with, we must be prepared for the worst."

He looked around for a moment and crossed to one of the closets, returning a moment later. "Here, Sam. Put this on," he tossed her a thick glove. "If you're not able to hold that … butter sock, then you'll be vulnerable. Better to protect the hand wielding it." He then crossed to the wall by the fireplace. "Now you need a weapon, Freddie." Reaching up, he grabbed one of the two swords that decorated the mantle and handed it to Freddie. "Spencer told me you and your mother know your way around a sword. I confess myself curious."

"Are you serious?" Freddie examined the blade. "This thing is sharp! All I'm used to is the sabers they use in fencing leagues."

"If they see you wielding this, they might be discouraged from engaging you in battle. Better to have a weapon and not have to use it than to need it and not have it," Negi winked.

"Hmm, maybe you're right," Freddie thought out loud, making various motions with it to get used to the weight. "You know my mom used both of these to kick both Nora and her mother around at the same time."

"Plus, I'm sure Setsuna will be here soon. Since Chamo is with her, I'm sure he sensed the approach of our guests. Don't worry. If they're too much for you, I'll protect you, but I'm more concerned about Tsukuyomi." _I better not tell them of the time she took my arm off. Good thing I had my magia erebea at the time or I'd have lost it for good._ "If she shows up here, don't fight her, or you _will_ die. I am not joking with you, you saw what she did to Fate, so don't tempt fate on this one."

"Which fate?" Freddie look puzzled.

"What was that?" Negi blinked.

"You said, 'don't tempt fate.' Which 'fate' do you mean?"

"Oh yeah," Negi scratched his head. "I meant 'fate' fate, not 'Fate' fate."

"Still don't get it! That didn't help one bit!" _Darn, I feel like Sam!_

"Oh, just forget it then!" Negi laughed.

"Hey, both of you shut up!" Sam yelled. "Does anyone else hear that?"

"Hear what?"

Everyone looked around to see Spencer helping Carly up the stairs and into the living room.

"Carly!" Sam and Freddie rushed over to group hug their friend.

"We're so glad you're all right," Freddie said after they separated. "We were worried Nora might have done something terrible to you by now."

"Well, I was lucky Negi showed up when he did, though I had my doubts that he'd be able to distract and subdue Nora like this," Carly sighed, straightening her hair, which has become quite messy during her brief but torturous captivity. "Otherwise, there's no telling what could have –"

"Quiet!" Negi commanded them loudly, putting his hands to his ears. "Does anyone else hear that?" he whispered. "Sounds like … EVERYONE GET DOWN!" he dove forward and tackled everyone to the floor and covered them with his own body as best he could. No sooner had he pushed everyone out of the way than the front half of an old car came crashing through the door, sending debris flying everywhere. Most of the debris missed them, but a large chunk of wood containing the doorknob shot through the air like a bullet, straight into the back of Negi's head.

When the dust settled, Spencer wriggled out from under the pileup. "Hey, is everyone okay? Negi?" Then he saw Negi's face. His eyes were closed and there was a thin stream of blood flowing down his face. He checked the boy's pulse. "Oh no, he's out cold! Everyone get up, we've got company!"

Then they heard Nora laugh. "You should have gotten out of here when you first freed Carly. Now, you're not going anywhere," she giggled in an evil way as the car doors began to open. "Get ready to meet the Dershlits!"

* * *

Spell Translation:

_Flans exarmatio - _Blow forth and disarm (Wind disarmament)

_Aer capturae_ - Binding wind

* * *

I hope this chapter was to everyone's liking. Having recently rewatched iStill Psycho, I wanted to continue the trend of someone smashing in the door. First was Gibby, then T-Bo's motorcycle, and now the Dershlit family car!

In the next chapter, the action is going to start in earnest, so expect at least a month or so before it's up, so that I can start building on the fight scenes, making them as intensely detailed as I can.

**If anyone has something they want to see next chapter (fight pairs, Dershlit family member names, etc.), then please send me a PM or write a review and tell me what you want. I'll listen, so don't wait or leave it to someone else! This is your chance to have a say in how the most important part of this fic happens.**


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